Commentary:
Ah yes, the classic "texting energy crisis" – it's like the battery icon in my brain is perpetually on 10% 🤣🔋📱
Let’s draft everyone who has their phone on military time first, since you’re all so eager.
Commentary:
Guess those who use military time are already clocked in for service! ⏰👩✈️📞
WW3: I can’t fire my weapon unless I first watch a 15-second unskippable ad for Raid Shadow Legends.
Commentary:
Guess you could say warfare really is taking an ad-vanced approach these days! 🎮🔫😂
I love replying “Need him” when someone posts their boyfriend on their Instagram story.
Commentary:
When you’re single and supportive but might need to borrow one yourself 😂💁♀️❤️
Engaging in deforestation (trimming my bush).
Commentary:
I'm on an epic quest to uncover ancient ruins (i.e., my lost patio furniture) 🌿✂️🪑
None of the Instagram story fonts represent me.
Commentary:
Maybe they need a new font called "Constantly Confused" just for us! 🤔😅📚
“Can my boyfriend come?” Will he contribute to our conversation, at least one question?
Commentary:
Tell him to practice some good questions, like asking for the Wi-Fi password! 😂📶
It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.
Commentary:
Looks like the sun's trying to start its own blues band! 🎸🪗🔥
When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.
Commentary:
🏝️😂 Sign me up for 'Hate Island': where the theme song is just the sound of closing browser tabs!
Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.
Commentary:
Sounds like a great way to bond… or be banned! 😂🃏🚫