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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

She was unique, like a millennial that could drive a stick shift.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

The older I get, I realize my mom was right, but I just didn’t like her tone.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

Made my last mortgage payment. Yay! I still owe a lot, I’m just not paying anymore.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Born to say “Who the hell raised you to be this stupid.” Forced to work in groups.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Went out of town, came back and the roomba changed all the locks.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Calling someone a “tough cookie” is not a compliment, tough cookies are literally the worst cookies.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

It’s crazy that we’re closer to the year 3000 then I am to finding love.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,689

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

Making waves on Instagram:

How dare you say I’m crazy on the eve of my cat’s wedding?

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Adding “but that’s just me” after giving the absolute worst advice to a coworker.

Shared recently on Facebook:

You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’m a credit card, cause I’m always being used or denied.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Please don’t celebrate April Fool’s day if you’re not a fool. My culture is not your costume.

Making waves on Twitch:

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

Trending via Telegram:

Everybody boo’d up, and I’m getting treated like celery on a hot wing plate.

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you’re both trying to avoid a conversation and accidentally starting a duel 😂😅🙈

combo, crazy, expression, face, funny combo, humor, mean, mean face, personality, personality trait, resting, resting face, shy, trait

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

0

2 months ago

British, British food, culture, food, grateful, gratitude, gross, humor, independence, joke, taste
Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

0

2 months ago

able, adulthood, being, breakfast, choices, cooky, doing, eat, eating, humor, irony, responsibility
“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

0

2 months ago

dark, dark humor, frustration, health, humor, just, live, mental, mental health, password, resilience, sarcasm, too, wait
Job applications are so stupid. “What’s your desired salary?” Ten billion dollars. Next question.

0

2 months ago

application, billion, dollars, exaggeration, humor, interview, job, job application, money, negotiation, next, question, salary, stupid, ten
My signature move is always learning my lessons the hard way.

0

2 months ago

always, hard, hard way, humor, improvement, learning, lesson, lessons, life, life lesson, mistake, move, self, self-improvement, signature, signature move
One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

0

2 months ago

difference, gender, humor, men, nice, relationship, smell, women

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Messenger this month:

When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

19 shares on Slack this month:

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

Photogenic people are magical. You could snap a pic of them mid- explosive diarrhea, and they’d still look good.

85 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

39 shares on Instagram this month:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

81 shares on X this month:

I’m not worried about WWIII. I’ve been feeding a crow army for three years.

58 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s so peaceful when you have no interest in other people’s business.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

If men didn’t exist, I would simply go for a 2 a.m. walk every night and listen to music in my AirPods.

61 shares on Threads this month:

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

86 shares on Pinterest this month:

So apparently problems don’t go away if you ignore them.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I enjoy long, romantic walks … to the departure gate.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Apparently, throwing the remote against the wall didn’t help recharging the batteries.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Manifesting you in my bed.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Imagine buying a new car, and some superhero throws it at an alien.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Lou Read is the name of my favorite musician and also the book I keep in the toilet.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

That “meeting canceled” ping is a gift from the Gods.

Shared recently on X:

Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

“I’m so grateful that so many things are none of my business.”

Going viral on TikTok:

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

Going viral on Slack:

Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

Trending via Threads:

If we keep saving daylight, daylight will never learn to save itself.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Reading a book is nice, but reading a book in the middle of the night when everyone is asleep is even better, it’s therapeutic.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

Job applications are so stupid. “What’s your desired salary?” Ten billion dollars. Next question.

My signature move is always learning my lessons the hard way.

One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨