Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Never underestimate my ability to effortlessly make something more difficult than it needs to be.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, I don’t think before I speak, so l am just a shocked as you are.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I’ll be notified immediately.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

It’s almost time to put winter tires on the struggle bus.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

My DNA came back saying I come from a wide selection of cheeses.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Customers will say shit like, “Uhh, it’s asking me to remove my card?”

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

When you accidentally laugh at your own thoughts, and now people are staring.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

I like warm weather but only to a certain degree.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,414

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.

Spotted on Telegram:

I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

Just shared via X:

I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Thanks to social media, you can now meet weirdos from the comfort of your own home.

Just shared via Discord:

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

Spotted on Threads:

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Sorry for levitating at the end of your bed all night, I just think you’re really cute.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Roadtripping with my family has taught me that my marriage can withstand anything except roadtripping with my family.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

This meeting could have been a push down the stairs.

The day I start waking up early it’s over for you all.

0
The day I start waking up early it’s over for you all.
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Commentary:
Well, looks like the early bird better pack its bags—because once that alarm clock starts ringing at dawn, the rest of us are toast! 🌅✨🤣 Better enjoy your sleep while you can, buddy. The revolution of punctuality is coming! 🐓⏰😉

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on Reddit this month:

Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m optimistic, in a pessimistic way.

94 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m just a girl standing in front of a cat who followed me to the bathroom.

37 shares on Slack this month:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

I should get paid a lot more for being the boss of me.

91 shares on Facebook this month:

French is bullshit. They keep changing the translation of ‘soup du jour’ each day.

48 shares on Discord this month:

Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

81 shares on TikTok this month:

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

48 shares on Discord this month:

Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.

52 shares on TikTok this month:

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Who needs an alarm clock when you have a bladder.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

All my life choices led me to this post right here, and if that’s not an indictment of free will, I don’t know what is.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Breaking news: Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

One day my sanity went out for smokes and never came back.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Why is it called Christian community and not Holyfans?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I like my men like I like my coffee. Not that hot but still making me anxious.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Do u guys also have a story in your head, and when you’re bored, you just add more to it and continue from where you left off?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,310

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

If you’re thinking of becoming a parent, just imagine working 6,570 days straight without a day off.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Work for a living? In this economy?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Our parents are going to be shocked when they find out that most of us are serious about not getting married.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

I need a long hot meteor shower.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

All quiet on the frontal lobe.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

My problem is I always think I can get ready in 15 minutes when I have repeatedly proven that I can’t.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Journaling was the most useless thing l ever attempted. Not only am I still suffering but now there’s evidence.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Starting drama with me the week before my period is an absolutely terrible idea – for you.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

It’s not my fault that when I said you looked “stunning” you assumed I meant in a positive way.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

Spotted on Reddit:

People say that they want to be tall, but don’t realize how many times tall people are assaulted by spiderwebs.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Sadly, I do my best proofreading after I hit “send.

Making waves on Telegram:

50 is the new 30. Because it takes 50 bucks to buy what 30 used to.

Shared recently on Slack:

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

Spotted on Facebook:

I have three full closets of nothing to wear.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

Seen just now on Discord:

Moms be like, “I needed this,” and it’s really just a break from being the one who holds it all together every single day.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

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