Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

Have we checked all food to see if exploding it makes it into something better or did we just stop with corn?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

If they stole your post, they probably need it more than you do.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Twitter is basically like a mental institution where everyone thinks they’re the sane one, and everybody else is crazy.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, sleeping for work, getting ready for work, or thinking about work.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

The only thing faster than an escalator is an escasooner.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

“Stalking”. God forbid I have access to public information and know how to utilize my resources.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Nothing ruins your weekend faster than remembering Monday is lurking in the shadows.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,395

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

Going viral on Slack:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Dark mode changed me. White screens now feel like staring into the sun.

Trending via Slack:

My bad habits got renewed for another season.

Making waves on Threads:

I always stop the microwave before it beeps because it’s not the boss of me.

Breaking via Slack:

Have I made bad decisions when I was drunk? Sure. But have the sober ones been any better? Not really.

Just shared via Twitch:

Incorrectly is the only word that, when spelled correctly, is still spelled incorrectly.

Making waves on TikTok:

An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.

Shared recently on Telegram:

In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place wieners and/or cheese slices in your pockets, so the search dogs will find you first.

Making waves on Slack:

Unpopular activity: minding your own business.

Today’s kids don’t even get chicken pox anymore, they go straight to STDs.

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Commentary:
Wow, kids these days are achieving things much faster 😅🍗➡️🚑

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on Reddit this month:

I wish berries were the size of apples. Just imagine for a second.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health.

83 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.

68 shares on WeChat this month:

If anime hair were real, there would be so much color dysmorphia. Like, imagine getting brown. I would be so pissed.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

44 shares on Threads this month:

I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.

58 shares on Instagram this month:

We all have that person who insists on using a blanket on the couch, no matter the weather.

54 shares on YouTube this month:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Only here for the honeymoon phase, don’t show me your true colors.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

Getting real tired of my own bullshit.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You know you’re getting old when you’re entering your birth year online and you need to spin that thing like you’re on wheel of fortune.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine being social on social media.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Acceptance truly begins when you ask Alexa to play classic rock and she plays a song that came out when you were in high school.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex is cool, but have you ever had a can opener that actually works?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I had a friend like me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Being single: When you don’t have to wait for someone to watch the next Netflix episode.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,357

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire sauce?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

I autograph every hotel Bible I find with “Best wishes, JC”.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I’m not religious, but if someone is turning water into wine, let’s take a second look.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

You used to calm me on my cell phone!

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Not to brag, but I can trip over things that aren’t even there!

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

Shoutout to myself for ruining my own life.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Going bananas on Slack:

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Not to brag, but I drove and found a place I was looking for without turning down my music today.

Spotted on Facebook:

If sex was real, I think I would’ve had it by now.

Seen just now on X:

Sorry, I’m late. I sat on my bed in a towel for 45 minutes, staring at the wall.

Just landed via X:

My superpower? Staying calm when talking to idiots.

Trending via YouTube:

Please don’t interrupt me when I’m trying to overhear something.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Sometimes I do this fun little thing, where I take the time to write a grocery list, and then I forget it at home.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I would describe my personal style as whatever is on top of the pile of clothes on the floor.

Making waves on X:

A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

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