Commentary:
Yearning: the only workout where the heart *and* the imagination get a cramp! 💔🤔
Tag Archives: 179 Funny actually quotes
I don’t get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am.
Commentary:
Acting like I'm on the verge of normalcy deserves an award or at least a cookie 😂🥳🍪
I actually check my emails every day in hopes I’m going to get some life-changing news someday.
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Waiting for that email like it's the Hogwarts acceptance letter, minus the owl. 📧🦉✨
I actually do check to see if you told me happy birthday before I tell you.
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Oops, my birthday memory is like a sieve—but don't worry, I still like you 364 days a year! 🎉🤔😂
After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.
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Doing dishes is like fighting a hydra—wash one, and two more appear! 🍽️🧼💦
It’s funny how people without pizzas in their hands actually think I’ll answer my door.
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No pizza, no entrance! My door has standards 🍕🚪😂
Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.
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When time travel's not invented yet but your memory insists it is. ⏳😂
Sorry, I would love to, but I just made a bunch of rules for myself, and I’m actually not allowed to do that.
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Rules are rules, and my imaginary committee takes them VERY seriously! 🎩📜😂
Vegetables are actually pretty good when they’re fried.
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I finally found a way to make my veggies stop screaming for help: deep fry them! 🥦🍟🤣