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Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has downloaded:

I hate it when my pillow is not pillowing like it should. You have one job. Be a pillow man. You are pillow. Act like one!

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡Ώ has copied:

I welcome change as long as nothing is altered or different than before.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡± has viewed:

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡° has viewed:

If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Έ has viewed:

Desperately seeking my soul, mate.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡³ has copied:

Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡² has viewed:

Don’t check on your introverted friends this time of year. They’re probably turning their lights off and pretending they’re not home.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has copied:

Some people change their faces like traffic lights change their lights.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ͺ has downloaded:

Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ό has downloaded:

The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

1938 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,100

Funny Quotes Topics

14,880

Funny Quotes Images

12,100

Updated

39 seconds ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Instagram:

If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I bet the inventor of the cannon would be relieved to know that they’re mostly about t-shirts now.

Spotted on Slack:

Got a new Roomba but keeping the old one to see if I can get them to fight.

Just shared via YouTube:

Most venomous snakes just make “Tsssss”. But I know some that say “Hi”.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

Just landed via X:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Starting conversations with short people by saying β€œback when I was your height…”

Just shared via YouTube:

I actually think my version of the lyrics makes more sense.

Spotted on Slack:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Spotted on Messenger:

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

1938 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,100

Funny Quotes Topics

14,880

Funny Quotes Images

12,100

Updated

39 seconds ago

Users Online

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ώ has shared:

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go, I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ώ has downloaded:

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has bookmarked:

Who called it a biological clock and not an egg timer?

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡° has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I just walked upstairs and remembered why.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡± has shared:

Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ώ has copied:

Kettlebells? I thought you said kettle chips.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡­ has downloaded:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ή has bookmarked:

Drinking a beer alone with terrible posture.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡· has downloaded:

Worst fears: 1. being infertile 2. being pregnant.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Babymaking music but it’s the Benny Hill theme song.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Nobody supports you like that one internet friend you’ve never met.

Just shared via Slack:

Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The only reason I haven’t gone crazy yet is because I’m just too lazy.

Going viral on WeChat:

Are cassette tapes considered classical music yet?

Just landed via X:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Just landed via Slack:

You can add β€œcha cha cha” to any sentence you want without explaining yourself. Nobody really appreciates this.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Just landed via YouTube:

Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

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