Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Commentary:
"Imagine the looks on the fish's faces as they see us approach… 'Oh look, here comes the two-eyed creature! Better swim away before it tries to give us a hug with its front-facing eyes!' 👀🐟😄"
6 months ago
Share →: The perfect number of cats is two stupid cats. Preferably siblings. But they can’t both be the same type of stupid. One needs to be stupid (dumb) and one needs to be stupid (annoying).

Commentary:
"Ah, the delicate balance of feline foolishness! 🐱🤪 Bringing two cats into your home is like starting a never-ending comedy duo act. One provides the laughs with its baffling dumb decisions, while the other keeps you on your toes with its perpetual peskiness. It's the perfect recipe for a madcap household! 😂🐾"
6 months ago
Share →: I hate when people ask me what I meant by something. Listen, I have no idea. I’m as confused here as you are. We’re both learning what I’m about to say at the exact same time.

Commentary:
"Communication is like a rollercoaster ride with me – buckle up and hold on tight because even I don't know where this sentence is going! 🎢😂 Let's embark on this wild linguistic journey together, discovering the meaning as it unfolds! 🤔🎉"
6 months ago
Share →: I heard God is testing both of us at the same time. Wanna hang out?

Commentary:
"Looks like God got tired of multitasking and thought, why not test two birds with one stone? 🕊️🪶 Bet He didn't expect us to team up and make a party out of it! 🎉 Let's show Him what teamwork really looks like! 💪😄"
6 months ago
Share →: The sexual orientation where you’re attracted to both and men and women but they’re not attracted to you is called Bi-yourself.

Commentary:
"Sounds like a classic case of 'Bi-yourself' – the ultimate dilemma of being attracted to both men and women, but ending up with no one interested in return! 😅💔 Remember, it's better to be 'Bi-yourself' than to compromise who you are for anyone else! 🌈 #LoveYourself"
6 months ago
Share →: One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

Commentary:
"Who needs two night stands when you can barely handle one? 🤔 Let's save some space for the important stuff – like a whole collection of mismatched socks under the bed! 🧦😂"
6 months ago
Share →: “Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Commentary:
"Trying to use 'pre' and 'post' together is like trying to hit pause and rewind on life at the same time ⏪🔄 Talk about a preposterous paradox! It's a linguistic rollercoaster – with no seatbelts! 🎢😂"
6 months ago
Share →: You can have kids or you can always know where your scissors are. You can’t have both.

Commentary:
"Parenting tip: Want to keep track of your scissors? Don't have kids! 🤷‍♂️👶✂️ #ParentingStruggles #WhereAreMyScissors"
6 months ago
Share →: The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

Commentary:
"Introducing the ultimate online showdown: Naked Debates! 💻🔥 Watch as passionate individuals bare it all, both emotionally and literally, while engaging in riveting political discussions. Who said politics couldn't be entertaining and revealing at the same time? 💬🔞 #NakedPolitics"
6 months ago
Share →: Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

Commentary:
Stereotypes and mass graves: two things you definitely don't want to be associated with! 🙅‍♂️ Let's treat people as individuals, not as part of a one-size-fits-all package deal. 🚫🏷️ #UniqueAndUnstereotyped