Commentary:
Chopsticks: Saving me from movie-level melancholy, one dumpling at a time! 🥡🥢😂
138 Funny expectation quotes
The way Christmas shopping expects me to have money right now is, honestly, disrespectful.
Commentary:
Finding extra cash during the holidays is like finding a unicorn in my wallet 🦄💸
Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?
Commentary:
Looks like someone messed up the frog-to-prince conversion chart again! 🐸👑🙃
All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.
Commentary:
Sounds like my power's been out longer than my wi-fi! 🔦📞😅
If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.
Commentary:
The real secret to academic success: upgrade your glasses with a rope for +10 intelligence bonus 🤓📚✨
When you thought something would be easy peasy lemon squeezy, but it’s actually been stressy, depressy, lemon zesty.
Commentary:
Welcome to the world of stressy, depressy, lemon zesty, where lemons aren't just for squeezing! 🍋😂
When I’m on hold and the song ends, I always expect someone to pick up the phone.
Commentary:
When the hold music stops, I'm ready with my acceptance speech 🙌🎤📞
By now, we’ve all figured out that these LED bulbs don’t actually last 15 years, but we’ve collectively decided to just let it slide.
Commentary:
Looks like those LED bulbs have the same lifespan as my New Year's resolutions 😆💡🔧
Everyone wants the bagel to be everything, but no one asks if the bagel needs anything.
Commentary:
Looks like it's time for a doughnut support group for neglected bagels 🍩🥯😅
My toxic trait is that I expect people to have common sense, and I get mad when they don’t.
Commentary:
"Common sense: not so common? 🚫🤔 Guess we're all just walking plot twists! 😂🙃"