Commentary:
"Still waiting for my grocery store dance battle debut! 🛒🕺💃😂"
141 Funny expectation quotes
Amazon cart: Order now and it will arrive today. Amazon confirmation email: LOL, just kidding, it’ll be a week from tomorrow.
Commentary:
When your Amazon cart writes checks that the delivery truck can't cash 😂📦✉️
The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.
Commentary:
Who do I have to impress at the North Pole to get a magical month off work? 🎅🏝️🗓️
Eating Chinese takeout is never as depressing as in the movies. It usually is good.
Commentary:
Chopsticks: Saving me from movie-level melancholy, one dumpling at a time! 🥡🥢😂
The way Christmas shopping expects me to have money right now is, honestly, disrespectful.
Commentary:
Finding extra cash during the holidays is like finding a unicorn in my wallet 🦄💸
Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?
Commentary:
Looks like someone messed up the frog-to-prince conversion chart again! 🐸👑🙃
All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.
Commentary:
Sounds like my power's been out longer than my wi-fi! 🔦📞😅
If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.
Commentary:
The real secret to academic success: upgrade your glasses with a rope for +10 intelligence bonus 🤓📚✨
When you thought something would be easy peasy lemon squeezy, but it’s actually been stressy, depressy, lemon zesty.
Commentary:
Welcome to the world of stressy, depressy, lemon zesty, where lemons aren't just for squeezing! 🍋😂
When I’m on hold and the song ends, I always expect someone to pick up the phone.
Commentary:
When the hold music stops, I'm ready with my acceptance speech 🙌🎤📞