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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

You’re in his DMs, so am I, but I am way funnier.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

If liars’ pants really did catch on fire, watching the news would be a lot more fun.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

The best piece of dating advice I’ve ever received is “If they like you, you’ll know. If they don’t, you’ll be confused.” Honestly, it’s all you need to know.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I get it, orcas. Sometimes you just need to ruin a yacht to feel something.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Asking Santa Claus for nudes.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

I thought I liked seeing movies, but it turns out I like eating candy in a dark room where it’s illegal to talk to me.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Dollar Tree needs to just go ahead and rename it to A Couple Dollars.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

I haven’t bought 1 Christmas gift but I got 3 packages on the way for me though.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,654

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Shared recently on X:

Opposites often not only attract each other, they often also undress each other.

Going viral on WeChat:

That was the last cup of coffee in my life. From tomorrow I’ll be drinking straight from the pot.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Driving a newer car is like “Oh weird, this one doesn’t have Shake on Highway, maybe they stopped making that feature”.

Seen just now on Reddit:

The hottest I ever look is when I’m brushing my teeth in my underwear, but it’s very much a ‘tree falls in the woods’ situation.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If the line at the grocery store takes longer than 10 minutes, the candy beside the checkout should be free.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Freshly posted on Discord:

“I’m so grateful that so many things are none of my business.”

Seen just now on X:

New email opener just dropped: “I am interested in bothering you!”

Funny festive fun quotes

Funny festive fun quotes bring the holiday cheer to a whole new level 🎉✨ Whether you’re decking the halls or cozying up with cocoa ☕️🎄, a little laughter goes a long way! From witty one-liners to playful jabs at holiday chaos, these gems will keep your spirits bright and your smile shining all season long 😄🎅. Get ready to spread some joy and giggles with every merry moment! 🎁🎊

New funny festive fun quotes 👇

All funny festive fun quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Discord this month:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

58 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Introverts don’t recharge with sleep, we recharge by being left completely alone for 3–5 business days.

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

61 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles.

23 shares on Twitch this month:

Jacket I left on a chair that sometimes looks like a person at night stuns in new evening nightmare.

78 shares on TikTok this month:

The world is such a beautiful place when you don’t think too hard about it or look around.

99 shares on Instagram this month:

Recovering people pleasers will be like, “I’m in my villain era!” and it’s just politely drawing healthy boundaries.

54 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ve learned a lot over the years, but the best advice I can ever give someone is never buy a used harmonica.

30 shares on YouTube this month:

Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t even know what the Transformers are fighting about, to be honest.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, the deadline for complaints was yesterday.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Every email sent to me should end with ‘but if your tummy is hurting, don’t worry about it.’

8 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s a famous ancient Chinese proverb, but it’s written in Chinese so I have no idea what it says.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at the age where using the wrong pillow makes you feel like you broke your neck.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Just pulled a Werther’s Original out of my pocket, like I’m 87 years old.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever notice how when you get home from food shopping, the kids turn into airport security?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Google Maps should start screaming the more wrong turns you make.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,586

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

On the internet it’s super easy to take credit for stuff you had nothing to do with. That’s why I invented it.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

The fact it costs $15 to get a basic meal at a fast-food restaurant now is comical.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

When you are in your 20s, there is going to be an urge to binge The Sopranos. it is very important that you press play.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Please, if you ever offer me a snack and I say no, ask me again, I didn’t mean it the first time.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Spotify Wrapped, but for all your bad decisions this year.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

It’s time for basic human empathy to make a comeback.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

The older I get, no.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

This post ain’t gonna like itself, damn.

Making waves on Instagram:

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m not moody; I’m just on shuffle.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Whatever doesn’t kill you is probably still trying.

Just shared via Facebook:

If Twitter has taught me anything, a lot of us aren’t ready for a spelling bee.

Shared recently on Discord:

That strange moment when you are trying to be serious, but then you accidentally smile.

Going viral on Threads:

I miss when bills were none of my business.

Breaking via TikTok:

The final level of being smart is just pretending you don’t know anything to make your life easier.

Going viral on Instagram:

My favorite kind of gender reveal is the one where the parents find out, and they just tell everyone through text instead of making me go to a party.

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