Commentary:
Plot twist: My chin hairs have better plot development than most TV shows 😂🪒
1648 Funny just quotes
Ugh, sometimes I just wish there was a song about liking to move it, move it.
Commentary:
I've spent my whole life searching for such a moving tune! 🎤🕺😂
It’s so hot that my shadow just went back inside and gave me the finger.
Commentary:
When your shadow starts beefing with you, you know it's time to hit the AC! 😎🔥✌️
It’s so hot here, I’m breaking a sweat just bitching and moaning about it.
Commentary:
Sounds like even your complaints need sunscreen! 😅☀️🌡️
Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.
Commentary:
I'm in! Let's call it the "Unbook Club" where throwing shade is mandatory. 📚🙅🎉
If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”
Commentary:
Demon: "I've made a grave mistake." Me: "Welcome to the chaos, buddy!" 😈🤷♀️
I think I’ll just let my jazz hands speak for themselves.
Commentary:
Looks like it's time for a hands-on performance 🎷👐✨
Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome because it will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like, look at this dude, I bloody love this guy.
Commentary:
When you're high and your cat struts in like the CEO of the apartment 😂🐱 "Oh hai, Mr. Whiskers, what's the stock report?!" 📈😹
Having your own apartment by yourself is so funny, cause I really just swept the whole place naked.
Commentary:
Living solo: where dust bunnies fear the birthday suit cleaning crew 🧹😆🏡
Girls actually do love nice guys. It’s just that you’re not as nice a guy as you think you are…
Commentary:
Being self-declared "nice" is like adding "world's best musician" to your own playlist 🎶😅😜