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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

It’s messed up how us humans have to obey all these laws while bears get to eat whoever they want.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

December, give me a sweet ending for this year please.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly. Because communication is key.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

When I was a child, my social network was called ‘outside’.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Thanksgiving should be called Feaster.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Might mess around and reply to all work emails with “make me”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,535

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

Perfume is key, but deodorant is keyer and showering is keyest.

Going viral on Telegram:

Tell your dog I said woof woof.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Reverse cowgirl so I can bend backward and look at him like the Exorcist.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

Just shared via Messenger:

I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.

Going viral on X:

I hate when people ask me what I’m doing tomorrow, I don’t even know what I’m doing today.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Spotify Wrapped: February was your basketball watermelon loudspeaker phone call hip hop moment.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Avocado toast at a cafe: $10. Avocado toast from Uber Eats: $25. Avocado toast made at home: $550 (my labor is worth $115 a minute).

Spotted on Slack:

Sorry it took so long to text you back; my social bandwidth was buffering.

Funny lifelong quotes

Funny lifelong quotes bring endless laughter 😂 and wisdom 💡 wrapped in a punchline! They remind us that life’s ups and downs are best faced with a smile 😄 and a little humor 🤪. Whether you’re having a rough day or just need a mood boost, these witty words are here to brighten your journey 🌟 and keep the good vibes rolling! Ready for some giggles and life lessons? Let’s dive in! 🎉

New funny lifelong quotes 👇

All funny lifelong quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on YouTube this month:

The Wi-Fi stops working for 2 minutes, and suddenly I start thinking about life.

18 shares on Slack this month:

Having a job ruined my life.

89 shares on Messenger this month:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels.

63 shares on Slack this month:

Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!

22 shares on Threads this month:

I love sleeping in fishnets. Makes you feel like a big honey roast ham.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

I like my bacon like I like my men, slightly burnt and crispy, and probably killing me slowly.

19 shares on Messenger this month:

Do you enjoy addiction, anxiety, and urinating? Then coffee may be the beverage for you.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

It’s jarring for me when there are British people in the Midwest. How did you get this far inland?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Clothes too dirty for the closet, but too clean for laundry. Welcome to: the chair.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Am simultaneously the family’s black sheep and gold star, and that’s exactly why I’m the way I am.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Overthinkaholic!

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Life hack: if you run out of treadmill space for your clothes, get a piano.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I am absolutely delicious, and I hate how mosquitoes know it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,716

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Humans were not meant to have this many passwords.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

I’ve reached the age where I just bought a bird bath for my backyard.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Why do parents bust in your room like they trying to catch you cheating on them with another pair of parents or something?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

If you have gray in your beard, you can hit it.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I’m not a morning person. I’m not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

There’s a cougar warning in my neighborhood, but apparently it’s just a big cat. I bought a case of wine coolers for nothing.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

The potholes in my city will change your radio station and unlock the doors.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Wanna know a real adult life hack? Don’t tell anyone when you have a day off. Absolutely no one.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

It’s so hot here, I’m breaking a sweat just bitching and moaning about it.

Breaking via Discord:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right louder.

Just shared via Reddit:

Kind of rude you didn’t wake me up before you went went.

Seen just now on Slack:

Babe, what’s wrong? You’ve barely tweeted your manic thoughts today.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Humans are just chaos wrapped in meat, going bananas on caffeine.

Trending via X:

Wish I came with subtitles because I mumble a lot.

Trending via Pinterest:

If you push your belly button and nose at the same time, your brain takes a screenshot.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

Making waves on X:

Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

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