Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

My favorite part of the Bible is when Jesus says to put a cross emoji and a Bible verse in your bio, and then call people slurs on the internet.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

I was having a great day, and then, people.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I only drink when I people.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I hope this email kills us both.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

It’s okay to feed your car a curb, as a little treat sometimes.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,783

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Maybe your soulmate’s just late, like, wildly behind schedule.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Am I finishing my education or is my education finishing me?

Just landed via WeChat:

Introducing WifeChat™, the app where you talk to your wife.

Just landed via X:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Breaking via Reddit:

Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the terms and conditions I do not read.

Shared recently on Telegram:

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Withholding sex from you people isn’t working.

Spotted on YouTube:

I love how bananas just take over the whole smoothie. You can never dim her light.

Trending via Threads:

Even though he murders a lot of people, you can tell Freddie Kruger is a fun loving guy cause he goes by Freddie and not Fred or Frederick.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Valentine’s Day is a stupid and made up holiday unless someone wants to give me a present in which case I really believe in celebrating it.

Funny safely quotes

Funny safely quotes bring a smile 😄 while reminding us to stay cautious 🦺 and smart! Whether you’re on the road 🚗, at work 🛠️, or just living your best life, a little humor goes a long way in keeping safety top of mind. Ready to laugh and learn? Let’s dive into some witty wisdom that proves safety doesn’t have to be serious all the time! 🎉🛡️

New funny safely quotes 👇

All funny safely quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on Discord this month:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

18 shares on Threads this month:

I went downstairs to get my charger. I came back up with a bowl of ice cream and no charger.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

“You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.

26 shares on X this month:

Peeling a sweaty sports bra off counts as aerobic exercise, right?

69 shares on Slack this month:

I’d rather lose you than the argument.

92 shares on Twitch this month:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

50 shares on Threads this month:

You ever notice how when you get home from food shopping, the kids turn into airport security?

68 shares on WeChat this month:

Entered this world crying, and honestly, not much has changed.

59 shares on Facebook this month:

If you’re going to stare all night and not say hello, do you mind taking your fingers and squishing my head from across the room?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing more dangerous than an ignorant man who thinks he is a genius.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

White, black, yellow, brown, Democrat, Republican, man, woman, straight, gay, transgender, Jew, Christian, Muslim, young and old — you will all taste the same to the zombies.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

How can I be ready for the future when I’m not even ready to get up in the morning?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

No we can’t hangout, you’ll end up falling in love with me and I don’t have time for that.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Back to the Future and chill?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Behind every great tweet is a person rolling their eyes.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s with a heavy heart and a deep sadness that I have to announce that I’m at work.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Marriage is just asking each other, “What do you want to do for dinner?” and then replying, “No, not that,” until death do us part.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 50s, you now take supplements to help your memory, but you can’t remember if you took them today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,755

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Stop eating cakes with the fakes and come eat a bundt with a cundt.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Did it hurt when you forgot your headphones and couldn’t romanticize your walk home?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

They say an apple a day keeps a doctor away. But what do I need to eat to keep everyone away?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

They should invent a Sunday that’s longer than a couple of minutes.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Why is 4-8 p.m. on a Sunday the most depressing time ever?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the terms and conditions I do not read.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I heard you like bad girls. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Breaking via Messenger:

Next time I die, I’m going to make sure I’m reincarnated someplace other than Earth.

Going viral on TikTok:

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

Live now on TikTok:

An evil genius rising to a position of power is bad but it makes sense at least. Feels insulting we’re constantly seeing evil idiots doing it instead.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Have you noticed? When the relationship is new, the guy is never busy.

Making waves on WeChat:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Problems are like balls. Everyone thinks they have bigger ones than you.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴