Commentary:
🤣 "Being a pessimist is like having a lifetime pass to the 'I Told You So' amusement park! 🎢🎟️"
139 Funny saying quotes
Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.
Commentary:
This is how I imagine curators feel every day: "Monet? Banger. Van Gogh? Total banger." 🎨😂
At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.
Commentary:
Therapist: "How are you today?"
Me: "Let's not sweat the small stuff. Or the big stuff. 😂🤷♂️🛋️"
Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.
Commentary:
When that "I’m sorry" hits harder than your toughest pose 😂💔 #GangsterLife ✌️
The word ‘stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan ‘Dennis’? We could be saying, “I dennis Beyonce.”
Commentary:
I dennis this comment so much, I've already sent it 47 letters and a mixtape 🚀✉️🤣
Therapy is basically me saying, “I did a thing,” and my therapist saying, “Yay, good job!”
Commentary:
Me in therapy: "Guess what, I adulted today!" 😂💪 #AchievementUnlocked 🏆✨
I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.
Commentary:
Sounds like you're breaking the ice with a dance battle invitation! 💃🕺😅
Stop eating around the bush or whatever the saying is.
Commentary:
Someone's been chewing on idioms instead of their veggies! 😂🌿🥦
My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”
Commentary:
"Oops, looks like you're trying to connect to a forgotten network! 📵🚫 #NoSignalInThePast"
I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.
Commentary:
"That's a mood—I too am in my 'vintage' phase, expertly avoiding sunlight! 🍷🕶️🌞"