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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New funny quotes: 6 this month

15,831 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

104 Funny times quotes

Funny times quotes 😄 are the perfect pick-me-up to lighten any mood and bring a smile to your face! Whether you’re looking for a chuckle on a gloomy day 🌧️ or a giggle to share with friends, these witty gems are sure to tickle your funny bone 😂. Dive into a world of humor and let the laughter roll in! Whether you’re in need of a quick laugh or a bit of comic relief, these gems have got you covered! 🙌✨

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

Getting paid 26 times in 365 days is not my destiny.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she won’t notice. Call her fat once and she will never forget. That’s because elephants never forget.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

A person becomes 10 times more attractive not by their looks but by photoshop.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Gravity, at all times, is trying to pull your pants down.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

That awkward moment when you’ve said “What?” three times, so you just say “Oh, yeah..” even though you have no idea what they said.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard, but you’ll be okay. Here’s a coffee and a million dollars.”

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Sometimes I don’t worry about things at all and other times I am awake.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Three out of five times, my intuition is right. Not in casinos, though.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

We should all start texting each other like old time explorers. ‘Dearest friend, I have survived another week. The horrors persist.’

Posted onMay 25, 2026

It’s called a Caesar Salad because you stab it a bunch of times when you eat it.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

If I was polyamorous, I think Id date my girlfriend three times.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

Man, these end times are taking forever.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

I like riding by myself so I can replay 1 song 111 times with no complaints.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

Forgetting your phone at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times.

Posted onMay 24, 2026

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

I don’t always push on pull doors but when I do, I do it two or three times to confirm how dumb I really am.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

I was brought up in the wild by hyenas. Times were hard, food was scarce but we had some great laughs.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Just gonna drink light beers today, because I don’t wanna get drunk but I do enjoy peeing 30 times.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Men, it’s really simple. We want everything, but nothing, at the same time or different times, sometimes but not always.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

How I flirt? I look at an attractive person several times and hope that they are bolder than me.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

You can count the number of times my wife has agreed with me on one hand, if you don’t have fingers.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

How many times does one have to open the fridge door before cake appears inside?

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, I’m never sending you nudes again.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

Good news: I only ate one slice of pizza. Bad news: I did that four times in a row.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

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