Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

When you’re using Grok, the A in Al just stands for Adolf.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Having a car is crazy cause you gotta take it to the car doctor.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Enjoy your 30s, because in your 40s, your first check engine lights come on.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Some people should have read-only access to the internet.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

I’m so single, even my husband won’t match with me on Tinder.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Make sure you stock up on condoms, so you don’t produce any more idiots.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,370

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

Hair is washed. I am finally lovable and capable of loving again.

Just shared via Telegram:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Seen just now on Discord:

Might mess around and reply to all work emails with “make me”.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

Making waves on Instagram:

This is a horrible time in history to be a decent human being.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Tired of looking at a bad screen. Can’t wait to get home and look at a good screen.

Trending via Pinterest:

‘Tis the season to wrap objects in colorful paper with the fine motor skills of a T-Rex.

Trending via Messenger:

Never eat more than you can lift.

Spotted on Telegram:

In your 20s, you will be tempted to prove that you’re doing well. It’s important you resist performing for an audience that isn’t watching.

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Trying to open that package turns me into the Hulk, but with way fewer muscles and a lot more frustration 😤💪📦

frustration, hate, here, i, open, opening, package, person, sealed, tear, tear here, try, using

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

How is this the same brain that used to remember everybody’s phone numbers?

0

5 months ago

aging, brain, forgetfulness, humor, memory, nostalgia, number, numbers, phone, phone number, remember, same, used
Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

0

2 months ago

family, followers, humor, joke, kids, last, media, name, parent, parenting, should, social, social media
People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

0

2 months ago

annoy, humor, i, interaction, life, me, online, people, real, real life, sarcasm, social, social interaction
Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

0

2 months ago

acceptance, dark, dark humor, humor, identity, individuality, irony, killer, self-acceptance, serial, serial killer
It was me, I let the dogs out.

0

2 months ago

antic, confession, dog, funny moment, humor, i, let, let out, me, moment, pet, pet antic, responsibility
We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

0

2 months ago

change, fergalicious, humor, living, society, times

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on X this month:

I don’t care if it’s AI or an immigrant, I desperately need someone to take my job, it’s killing me.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

The worst part of a fender bender is having to get out of your car and meet a new person.

77 shares on Reddit this month:

You don’t get much engagement? Have you tried being retarded.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

86 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Twitter can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

87 shares on Discord this month:

By accepting their pardons, the turkeys are admitting guilt.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

The female ability to be able to guess exactly which girl it is out of his 740 following.

97 shares on Messenger this month:

In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m the type of person to go back to sleep and try to finish a dream.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

The best part of Thanksgiving is being with family and friends, and a vast array of pies.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Good morning to everyone except the baristas who don’t tighten the lid.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Not really into dating right now, but very into flirting, and that’s where things get complicated.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

If you’re going to stare all night and not say hello, do you mind taking your fingers and squishing my head from across the room?

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Being single is so crazy. What do you mean there’s No One?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

I’m going to a karaoke bar tomorrow, where I’ll sing every song in the style of Yoko Ono.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Watching “Dirty Dancing” as a teenager: Damn right, no one puts Baby in a corner. Watching “Dirty Dancing” as an adult: This girl is a brat and needs a lesson.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

I love cute tiny purses, but I’m sad to say I can never be a cute tiny purse girl. I need to haul my hoard of objects everywhere I go, because what if….

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

I slept for 11 hours last night, just wanted everyone with kids to know that.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Transgender ambulance driver whose pronouns are we/you/we/you/we/you.

Going viral on TikTok:

In an effort to keep our house clean before Thanksgiving, I’ve asked my family to go live somewhere else.

Shared recently on Slack:

Pizza crusts go uneaten, but people will devour an entire pan of breadsticks.

Spotted on WeChat:

Unfortunately, if you want to end your single life, you have to do something. So that’s not for me.

Shared recently on Messenger:

It’s not getting better or worse, but rather a third mysterious thing.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?

Trending via TikTok:

I need a room full of mirrors because I want to be surrounded by winners.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Lately, when I meet new people, I ask them what their hobbies are instead of what they do for work, and let me tell you, the conversations have been absolutely top tier!

Trending via TikTok:

Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

How is this the same brain that used to remember everybody’s phone numbers?

Kids should get the last name of whichever parent has more followers.

People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

It was me, I let the dogs out.

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨