Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Gave my family the wrong address for our beach rental. Hoping to get a couple days in before they find me.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

The fake cough I use when calling in sick is now available on iTunes.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Roadtripping with my family has taught me that my marriage can withstand anything except roadtripping with my family.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Brother: What are you bringing to Thanksgiving dinner? Me: Wine and unresolved issues. They pair nicely.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

That uncle or aunt who kept their distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense as you get older.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

My anxiety is chronic, but my overthinking is iconic.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,468

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Just shared via X:

Intelligence is now free, and the golden age of the nerd is over.

Breaking via Pinterest:

One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I changed my password to ‘incorrect’ so whenever I forget it, the computer tells me it’s incorrect, and I’m like, ‘Wow, you didn’t have to be so rude about it.’

Freshly posted on Telegram:

My body is 70% water and 30% tired of pretending I know what I’m doing.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

When your stomach is really mad at you, and you’re not sure which one of your 13 unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it.

Going viral on TikTok:

Parents be like “Boys are easier,” and then their daughter has to save the family from ruin.

Making waves on Slack:

Stopping a complete stranger on the street and saying, “Let’s end this little charade.”

I’ve never seen a Cybertruck with anyone in the passenger seat.

4 weeks ago

Witty joke about the Cybertruck's emptiness, playful and humorous text on an image.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like the passenger seat in a Cybertruck is reserved exclusively for Elon Musk's ego! 🚗👤 #LonelyRide

anyone, Cybertruck, empty, empty seat, humor, never, observation, passenger, seat, seen, tech, vehicle

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If parallel universe exist, I hope the other me is doing well.

4 weeks ago

doing, exist, hope, humor, i, me, other me, parallel, parallel universe, self-reflection, universe, well, well-being
Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

4 weeks ago

active, call, calling, excuse, humor, i, missed, phone, response, saw, sorry, volcano
Nothing tops a plain pizza.

3 weeks ago

food, humor, nothing, pizza, plain, plain pizza, simple, simple food
Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

4 weeks ago

board, board games, competition, family, fun, game, game night, games, humor, i, lose, night, only, playful, rivalry, sibling, sibling rivalry
I’m bringing back “hold your horses” and nobody can stop me.

4 weeks ago

back, bring, bring back, hold, hold your horse, horse, humor, me, nobody, nostalgia, stop
The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

1 month ago

better, clean, clutter, echo, house, humor, irony, order, organization, stuff, unsettling

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m not like the other girls. I’m a 37 year old man.

99 shares on Instagram this month:

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

64 shares on X this month:

Answering your cell when you don’t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.

18 shares on Slack this month:

People who cook breakfast before going to work are too mature for me.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

20 shares on X this month:

Come on, karma, do your job.

57 shares on Slack this month:

Someone needs to make an app for a Tamagotchi that you keep alive by going offline.

18 shares on Twitch this month:

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

34 shares on Slack this month:

This post is highly top-secret. You need to forget that you’ve seen it immediately.

87 shares on WeChat this month:

The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Which wine pairs best with WWIII?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Cooking with glasses on is so humiliating. Why did I just get blinded by steam?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

The grass is only greener on the other side because of all the bullshit on it.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

There is too much happening for mid-December. Where are the canceled meetings? Why are we not circling back next year?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

It’s amazing how music can transport you to another place. For example, this coffee shop is playing Justin Bieber, so I’m going to another restaurant.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Going to ask seven friends for advice and then execute my original plan.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Every time I wanna quit, I remember horses don’t stop.

Trending via TikTok:

For Christmas, I’d like to be understood.

Going bananas on Telegram:

I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I really can’t wait until it all works out.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m going to be a printer today and just not work.

Going viral on Instagram:

British people be like “YouChube.”

Seen just now on Twitch:

I’ve worn oversized T-shirts so much that I suffocate if I wear one that actually fits.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Me: I’ve always wanted to stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes. Interviewer: I meant more like “professional goals”.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Going to a concert with a tomato in each hand just to make the band nervous.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’ve never seen a Cybertruck with anyone in the passenger seat.

Keep the laugh going 😂

If parallel universe exist, I hope the other me is doing well.

Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

Nothing tops a plain pizza.

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

I’m bringing back “hold your horses” and nobody can stop me.

The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨