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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

If anyone wants to watch the Super Bowl on a large 8k TV, come on over to my place (and bring a large 8k TV).

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

So stupid how New York is actually as cool as everyone says.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

To everyone who wrote “stay cool” in my year book, I have some devastating news.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I’d just laugh and search with them.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Imagine hating me, and I’m not even paying attention.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

A real smartphone would cut you off.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I don’t have bad handwriting, I’m just using my own font.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,507

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

The downside of common sense is, having to deal with those that lack it.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Twitter needs a button that’s “bring back that tweet I was just starting to read before you automatically refreshed.”

Going viral on Telegram:

I was not meant for Microsoft Teams.

Live now on Discord:

Anyone know which wine pairs well with societal collapse?

Spreading quickly via X:

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

Going bananas on Threads:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

There are people that make their bed every morning and people who think it’s a waste of time, and then they marry each other.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

Freshly posted on Slack:

I like my music at a volume where I can’t hear you.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

4 weeks ago

Funny tech joke about how MS Teams detects inactivity and exaggerates absence.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
MS Teams: The drama queen of software, assuming I've gone on a world tour every time I blink 🌍✈️😂

1, away, call, country, home, laptop, left, ms, MS Teams, remote, remote work, say, second, Teams, technology, video, video call, work, work from home

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Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m not easily offended, but I am easily annoyed.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

85 shares on Threads this month:

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

Every time I ask my husband to bring me something out of my purse, without a doubt, he’ll bring me my whole purse. Why are purses so scary to men, lol.

45 shares on Snapchat this month:

Podcasts are like babies, they’re too easy to create and not everyone should have one.

59 shares on Slack this month:

Is it fall yet? I really can’t suck my stomach in much longer.

93 shares on Twitch this month:

A murder on the dance floor would explain the panic! at the disco.

61 shares on X this month:

Show dominance by ending the year in bed.

63 shares on Snapchat this month:

Whoever is dating my ex, all I can say is: cheat first!

82 shares on Telegram this month:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

With a lollipop in one hand and a dandelion in the other, concentration is very important, as every summer child knows.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Girls know how to flirt until it’s with someone they actually like.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

The real threat to Democracy is the Bureaucracy.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I love saying “my man” and not his name, so when I get a new one, nobody knows.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

This is your sign to cancel all work meetings today.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

White elephant: Nothing brings people together like fighting over absolute garbage.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Never meeting another person again, so if I know you already, congrats!

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I once hated my job so much that I would come home from work and watch vlogs of people quitting their jobs, wishing it was me.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Telegram:

When I was a kid I would say I’m whatever age and a half because I wanted to be older. Now I say I turned 40 a few years ago.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

When the devil couldn’t reach me, he made my brain my biggest enemy.

Seen just now on TikTok:

If two witches watched two watches, which witch would watch which watch? Each witch would watch which watch belonged to which witch’s wrist.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I don’t understand my wardrobe. It’s full, but I don’t have clothes.

Freshly posted on Discord:

My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

Just shared via Instagram:

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

My plumber asked me for a Google review. I said I thought it was a really good search engine and I’d give it 8/10.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Saying “Hmmmm” when my boss walks in so he knows I’m thinking about stuff.

Going viral on Pinterest:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

They should invent harmless cigarettes for aura farming purposes.

The worst part about getting sucked up by the tornado you’re filming is to die knowing your wife was right. You are an idiot.

Computer dating is fine, if you’re a computer.

Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

I disagree with my politics.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

Keep the laugh going 😂

They should invent harmless cigarettes for aura farming purposes.

The worst part about getting sucked up by the tornado you’re filming is to die knowing your wife was right. You are an idiot.

Computer dating is fine, if you’re a computer.

Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

I disagree with my politics.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨