Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

37 shares on Telegram this month:

Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a thousand bats to get out of social situations.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

Wow, I absolutely love your outfit. The black really brings out the pet hair on it.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

19 shares on Telegram this month:

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

38 shares on Pinterest this month:

Bro, you’re not allowed anymore to have your tongue drop out of your mouth and form a stair case when you see my wife.

90 shares on Threads this month:

If a woman says “Do what you want!”, then for God’s sake don’t do what you want!

20 shares on WhatsApp this month:

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

30 shares on Messenger this month:

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

35 shares on Telegram this month:

Who called it girl math and not galgebra?

94 shares on Slack this month:

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.