Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

By the time I remember to text back, it be too disrespectful to even do it.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Babysitting a pair of twin babies right now and feeding them saying “here comes the airplane”. I don’t know, just feels weird.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

If your problem can’t be fixed by coffee, tequila or sex then I’m out of advice.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

You can have kids or you can always know where your scissors are. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

I can handle most things in life, but hearing people chew isn’t one of them.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Skinning your knee as an adult is so humiliating. That’s the toddler injury.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

I’m just another dysfunctional train wreck barreling down the tracks with a smile.