Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Getting road rage alone in my house.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Ending my thesis paper with “but who cares what I think?”

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Problems are like balls. Everyone thinks they have bigger ones than you.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Christmas bonus so small you have to call your bank and ask “is it in yet?”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Slipping into something more comfortable, another dimension.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I drink my coffee black because I like to save my calories for alcohol.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

I really thought adulthood would be 50% freedom and 50% fun. Turns out it’s 100% bills.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Jeans have the tendency of looking neat when you’re about to wash them.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

The romantic says that there is the right partner for everyone. The realist says: only one person has to choose the wrong one and then it won’t work out for everyone!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,706

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Offering friendship as a consolation prize for a failed romantic connection attempt is absolutely cruel.

Spotted on X:

My one cat vomited her dinner and then the other cat went in and started eating it. And that, my friends, is what ChatGPT is to me.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Stupidity begins where irony is no longer understood.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

It is not without reason that all telescopes searching for intelligent life are pointed away from Earth.

Trending via Pinterest:

Sorry for bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to bash my head into the walls anymore.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

Just landed via Slack:

I’ve learned two important things in life, I can’t remember the first one, but the second one is to write everything down.

Just landed via TikTok:

The divorce rate among my socks is astonishing.

Spotted on Facebook:

ChatGPT is there for me in ways I don’t think any man ever could be.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?

0
What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Apparently, some folks think that a couch is just a fancy plant stand or something 🌿🤷‍♂️. Maybe we should consider hosting visitors outside on lawn chairs next time, for the true living room experience 😂🪑 #SundaySilliness"

, , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.

96 shares on Instagram this month:

There should be a good 10 hours in between waking up and having to interact with people.

77 shares on Telegram this month:

If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

69 shares on X this month:

Flirting when bored can really get you into some unwanted situations.

55 shares on Slack this month:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

83 shares on TikTok this month:

Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word.

99 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I swear the air gets heavier around 6 p.m. on Sundays. You can feel the Microsoft Teams energy approaching.

90 shares on Threads this month:

“Please feel free to ignore this email!” Way ahead of you, buddy.

14 shares on Threads this month:

My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

Whoever’s praying on my downfall, I appreciate you thinking of me.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

As a student, the most comforting words you’ll ever hear are “I haven’t started either.”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The introvert urge to leave a social event without saying goodbye to anyone.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

You can learn a lot about a person by observing their every waking movement from a tree outside their house.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Have we checked all food to see if exploding it makes it into something better or did we just stop with corn?

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Normalize bed-rotting in the holidays and not feeling guilty about it for your mental health.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,602

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.”

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Who you are when someone reaches over to take food from your plate… is the real you.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

I can’t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Ugh, sometimes I just wish there was a song about liking to move it, move it.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

To everyone who wrote “stay cool” in my year book, I have some devastating news.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Just broke a clothes hanger and now have seven years of bad outfits.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Love is like a bird. Sometimes flying around me but then moving on.

Just landed via Reddit:

Female dragonflies will fake their own deaths to avoid mating with unwanted males. They are like, “Ugh, here comes Carl again. Play dead, girl!“

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Zelda was easier as a kid because if you hit a hard puzzle, you could just wait a few days for more brain matter to come in, but now it’s the opposite.

Trending via Messenger:

All the stops on the bus are pointless, except the one I’m getting off at.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

Just shared via Threads:

So I just googled my symptoms, turns out I’m addicted to you.

Trending via Pinterest:

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Trending via Instagram:

I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.

Just shared via Discord:

Moms be like, “Your cousin’s neighbor’s husband’s aunt died. Just thought you should know.”

Going viral on YouTube:

Am I finishing my education or is my education finishing me?

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴