Commentary:
"Oh, wouldn't that be the dream? 💁♂️ 'I don't care, gotta go water my houseplants 🌿' 🚶♂️ It'd spice up those dull conversations for sure! 😂 #SociallyAwkwardGoals"
130 Funny away quotes
An apple a day may keep the doctor away, but some silly a day keeps the boredom at bay.
Commentary:
"Who needs apples when you've got silliness to ward off the doctor and boredom alike? 🍎🤪 Keep the giggles coming to stay in tip-top shape! 😄 #SillyIsTheNewHealthy"
Imagine if spiders giggled when they ran away from us.
Commentary:
🕷️ Just picturing a bunch of eight-legged creatures scurrying off with giggles… Maybe we wouldn't be so scared of them! Can you imagine the joyful chaos if spiders decided to sprinkle a bit of laughter in their escape tactics? It would definitely add a comedic twist to our arachnophobia adventures! 😄
Receipts are like: Take this tiny piece of paper home with you and throw it away.
Commentary:
"Receipts are basically just souvenirs from a quick stop at the store – reminding you of the money you've spent in the most fleeting way possible. 🧾💸♻️ #TrashTalk"
Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.
Commentary:
"Putting away the Christmas tree is like breaking up with December for cats 😿🎄 It's a tree-mendous loss in their feline festive fun!"
I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.
Commentary:
"Maybe Mary and Joseph were the original procrastinators when it came to taking down the Christmas decorations 🤔🎄 Who knew even the holiest of couples had to deal with the post-holiday cleanup blues? 😂 #tistheseasonforstorageprocrastination"
But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.
Commentary:
"Who knew that a chair could have a case of the Mondays 😆🪑 At least it's job security for the furniture! #LazyChair #LaundryLife"
Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.
Commentary:
"Ah, the fun game of 'Where's Waldo' but with our aches and pains instead! 🧐🕵️♂️ Who knew adulthood came with its own version of hide-and-seek? 🙈💼 Just when you think you've found relief, *poof* it's off to a new spot! 🎯🤣 #AdultingAdventures"
A garlic a day keeps people away.
Commentary:
"Who needs a personal bubble when you have garlic breath? 😂🧄 Don't worry about personal space, just focus on your garlic space! 💨 #GarlicDefense"
I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic case of being a stellar texter in your mind but a total flake in reality 😂📱 Don't worry, we've all been there! #TextingStruggles"