Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Twitter needs a button that’s “bring back that tweet I was just starting to read before you automatically refreshed.”

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

You can’t hurt my feelings, I used to bring my dad the wrong tools.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,470

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

For my final act of love, I will never contact you again, but think of you always.

Just landed via Instagram:

I only trust people who give off unemployable energy.

Just landed via Instagram:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Yes, officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

Trending via Facebook:

Tweeting shouldn’t cost money but it should flip you on your back like a bug for 15 minutes.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

Going viral on Telegram:

And for my next trick, I will appear to know what I’m doing.

Trending via TikTok:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Just landed via Reddit:

We can do things one of two ways. My way or my other way.

Funny beating quotes

Funny beating quotes bring a hilarious twist to those moments of friendly competition and playful teasing! 😂 Whether you’re winning, losing, or just enjoying the game, these witty lines add extra fun and laughter to every beatdown 🥊🔥. Perfect for sharing with friends or spicing up your social media, get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even brag a little! 😎🎉

New funny beating quotes 👇

All funny beating quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on Twitch this month:

Everyone’s a gangster until they see a rainbow.

96 shares on Threads this month:

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

74 shares on Telegram this month:

Oligarchy sounds like something you dip your breadstick in at the olive garden.

65 shares on Slack this month:

If Monday were available for purchase at IKEA, it would be called “Fekking Hell”.

71 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t know who is writing my story, but they got to throw in a win somewhere or put the pen down. I need a break.

81 shares on X this month:

I wish I was waking up and going to the airport.

81 shares on Discord this month:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

34 shares on Snapchat this month:

Good morning only to those who duel at dawn, drink at dusk, and haunt their lovers in between.

80 shares on TikTok this month:

You’re a “haha” girl, and I’m an “lol” guy. It just wouldn’t work.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I be having full arguments in my head, then walk around mad like someone actually said something to me.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a rest for the wicked.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Some people avoid bacon for the sake of religion. I avoid religion for the sake of bacon.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is like a mental hospital where everyone thinks they are the only sane person and everyone else is crazy.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

“Nobody wants to work anymore!” Personally, I have never wanted to work.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Your honor, I have a role to play as the black sheep of the family.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,667

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as for 31 days? Where is my change?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Every time I use self-checkout, the person in front of me has never used self-checkout, touchscreens, or money before.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Those eyes ain’t gonna roll itself, let me help you.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I like to describe the difference between theory and practice with shopping lists and receipts.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

I’ll kill the vibe, so you don’t have to.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

This entire year has been the Nightmare Before Christmas.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

It seems really unfair that my future depends on me.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

This is the dumbest apocalypse ever.

Just shared via WeChat:

Occupation: the ugly friend!

Breaking via Telegram:

Why can’t hackers just delete everyone’s bad debt, credit, and mortgages?

Trending via TikTok:

I don’t want to brag but I found a recipe online, and then within three weeks not only made the recipe, but closed the tab on my browser.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Making waves on Messenger:

Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

Shared recently on Instagram:

At what point is a salad no longer a salad based on how much bacon I add?

Shared recently on Discord:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

Just landed via Discord:

Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

Making waves on Discord:

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

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