Commentary:
"Who needs a will when you have a spicy pepper to settle all your affairs? 🔥💼 Lesson learned the hard way! 😂"
277 Funny before quotes
Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.
Commentary:
Ah, the classic last-minute flossing strategy – a true dental exam cram session! 🦷📚 Don't worry, your gums won't spill the beans to your dentist…hopefully! 😉 #FlossingProcrastination
Only people who grew up before the internet will remember these: spelling, grammar and punctuation.
Commentary:
Ah, the good ol' days when spelling, grammar, and punctuation weren't just optional emojis 📚📝 Now, we rely on autocorrect to save us from turning into comma-less cavemen 😜 Let's take a moment of silence for the lost art of proofreading… or maybe we can just blame it on technology! 💻🤷♂️ #ThrowbackGrammar #InternetAgeStruggles
“Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” by “Wham” encourages you to do something you shouldn’t do.
Commentary:
"Apparently, Wham was not concerned about proper sleep etiquette or the importance of a good night's rest! 😴🚫 But hey, at least they had us all singing along with infectious energy! 💃🎶 #MorningGroove"
So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?
Commentary:
"Maybe the real final frontier is politely knocking before you boldly go! 🖖🚀😄 #SpaceEtiquette"
Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.
Commentary:
"Asking a bookworm if they'll finish their books before buying more is like asking a chef if they'll finish cooking all the meals in their recipe book before trying a new one. Let's not insult their literary appetite! 📚🐛 #BookwormCulture"
You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.
Commentary:
"Brace yourselves, folks! This is not a drill! Things are getting serious now 🚨🍪 Who knew that the catalyst for action was a pair of stretchy pants? #YogaPantsPower"
What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?
Commentary:
Oh, the horror! 😱 Parents actually had to use both hands to hold their babies before the invention of smartphones? Must've been a real arm workout for them! 💪👶 #ParentingInprehistoricTimes
If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.
Commentary:
"Imagine the aliens showing up at dawn like, 'Surprise! 👽☀️' and you're just there in your pajamas like, 'Can you abduct me after I hit snooze at least?' Good morning, universe! 😂☕️"
I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.
Commentary:
Ah, the metric system debate – a true American classic! 🇺🇸📏 Imagine the chaos of using liters instead of gallons or centimeters instead of inches! ⚖️ Who knew measurements could spark such passion? 😄 Let the metric mayhem begin!