Commentary:
Being early is like throwing a surprise party for yourself—no one else shows up!
483 Funny being quotes
Being underestimated is my favorite plot twist.
Commentary:
Every time someone underestimates me, I feel like the surprise twist in the final scene of a poorly-organized mystery novel.
Squirrels always look and act like it’s their first day being a squirrel.
Commentary:
When you're trying to adult but secretly have no idea what's going on 🤪🐿️✨
Naps hit different when you’re using them to avoid being alive.
Commentary:
When your spirit animal is a hibernating bear 😂😴🐻
Being a reader means voluntarily signing up for fictional heartbreak, and then recommending the pain to others.
Commentary:
Recommending emotional turmoil one book club at a time 📚💔😂
Sorry for being socially awkward. It’s just that I’m socially awkward.
Commentary:
Social skills loading… please wait… ⌛🤔😂
“There’s a reason religion tells you your reward is after death; it keeps you quiet while you’re being exploited alive.”
Commentary:
Eternal rewards program: Join now, redeem never. Heaven's got the best points system! 😇💸😂
Being alive and sentient has been the worst thing to have ever happened to me.
Commentary:
Proof that even my consciousness has buyer's remorse 😂🧠💭
Being naked with headphones on is so fun.
Commentary:
When you need to feel both free and plugged in at the same time 🎧😆🎵
Being depressed is so embarrassing. It’s like, look at me, guys. I have nothing positive to say, and I make everything miserable.
Commentary:
Putting the "fun" in dysfunction! 😅🙃 #MasterOfPessimism