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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Everyone wants the bagel to be everything, but no one asks if the bagel needs anything.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

My favorite machine at the gym is the one where you put change in, and snacks come out.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Every time a Taco Bell rings, an angel gets diarrhea.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

I’m going to be real with you. My dinners lately are just sort of me throwing things into a pot like a witch in a cartoon.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is: don’t do that!

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,699

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Just landed via Telegram:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Making waves on YouTube:

Liking sports is great because you’ll have a bad day, then here your team comes to make it worse.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

Just shared via Telegram:

Stop worrying if people like you. They don’t.

Going viral on TikTok:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

Making waves on Telegram:

My family was too poor for a gene pool, so we soaked our genes in rye whiskey.

Just landed via Threads:

I even procrastinate things I actually want to do.

Going viral on Discord:

Aging isn’t even 1% as scary as whatever is going on with the people trying not to.

Trending via X:

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

Funny detergent quotes

Funny detergent quotes bring a splash of humor to laundry day 🧺😂, turning boring chores into moments of laughter! Whether you’re battling stubborn stains or just folding clothes, these witty sayings add a fresh twist 🧼✨. Ready to brighten your wash routine with some sudsy fun? Let’s dive into a bubbly collection that’s sure to make you smile while you clean! 😄🧽🎉

New funny detergent quotes 👇

All funny detergent quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Pinterest this month:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

27 shares on TikTok this month:

Literally no one understands something more completely than a woman in a meeting who starts a question with “Just so I understand …”

70 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

45 shares on TikTok this month:

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever checked your bank account and had way more money than you expected.

44 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The fatigue is reaching levels that shouldn’t even be possible.

100 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

38 shares on Reddit this month:

A quick shoutout to all of the sidewalks out there… Thanks for keeping me off the streets.

22 shares on X this month:

“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” is now 40 years old. If you have an earworm now, you also have back pain.

46 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

49 shares on WeChat this month:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like my greatest accomplishment today has been not saying what I’m thinking out loud.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I always bring a glass of water to bed with me so I have something to knock over in the middle of the night.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My bank account is also in retrograde.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I had no idea being an adult would involve so many lotions.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,324

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Imagining how cathartic it must feel to send forth thousands and thousands of bats from your Transylvanian manor.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Hit the vape till it tastes like technology.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I’ve folded seven page corners of the book I’m reading. That’s 49 in dog ears.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

For me, math class is like watching a foreign movie without subtitles.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

If every day is a gift, today is socks.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Friends with consequences.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Kind of rude you didn’t wake me up before you went went.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

Italy stands for I Truly Always Love You.

Just landed via Slack:

I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch.

Live now on YouTube:

Hundreds, nay, thousands of movies about falling in love but only one movie about a beach that makes you old.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Netflix had enough cash to buy Warner Bros., but cried poor when we shared passwords with our mom.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Look, a three-day weekend is all I ask. The rest can be four-day weekends.

Just shared via TikTok:

Even worse than a spider is a spider that just disappeared.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Sorry, can’t. I took my bra off and threw it across the room an hour ago. There’s no coming back from that.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

It’s freezing cold outside and my polar bear won’t start.

Just shared via Pinterest:

My signature move is to tell men that I can’t hear them because I have my headphones in when I quite visibly don’t have headphones in.

Shared recently on Telegram:

No one tells you that the older you get, the more often you check your weather app.

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