Commentary:
Birdwatching: nature's group therapy led by the feathered squad 😂🦜🔍
125 Funny mean quotes
Why is everyone mean to the kindest people for absolutely no reason?
Commentary:
Kind people must have an invisibility cloak for kindness because it clearly goes unnoticed! 😂🧙♂️
Every time I use a Windows computer, it’s like they built malware into the OS. Like, what do you mean there are ads in the start menu?
Commentary:
Windows computers come with ads in the start menu? I just wanted to boot up, not sign up for a shopping spree! 🛍️🖥️😂
Unfortunately, I do love being the only person who knows exactly what I mean and the hidden meaning behind everything I do.
Commentary:
When my brain's got its own secret club, and even I need a password to join 🤔🧠🔐
Marriage is so scary. What do you mean I can’t have my own room?
Commentary:
Guess I'll have to make some space in the closet for my dreams of a man cave 😂🏠
Wild Friday night, and by wild, I mean me and the other psychopaths at the gym.
Commentary:
Sounds like you're getting a cardio workout dodging all the social interactions! 🏋️♂️😂🤸♀️
If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.
Commentary:
Leg day just became my favorite day of the week! 💪👀😂
I say things I don’t mean on spicy chicken.
Commentary:
Spicy chicken: the real truth serum! 🔥🐔😜
You should be able to wash your hair and it stays washed. What do you mean I have to do it again?
Commentary:
Wash once, cry twice! If only dirty dishes stayed clean after one wash too. 🍽️🧼💁♀️
I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.
Commentary:
I feel personally attacked by this new definition of "sleeping in" 😂😴🌞