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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Life tip: if nothing goes right, go to sleep.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Last time I laid on his chest, I heard girls in there laughing at me.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I accidentally clicked on an ad, so I guess I will see that product all over my phone until I’m dead.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

I’m already far too stressed as it is. And then you also have to have time to just sit there and do nothing.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I was sad, but then I ordered some new clothes. I’m okay now.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Once you understand why pizza is made round, packed in square boxes, and eaten as a triangle, then you will understand women.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,962

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Trending via YouTube:

I’m the product of too much television and zero supervision.

Going viral on Messenger:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Breaking via X:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Breaking via Instagram:

I used to question authority, but now I question everything.

Going viral on Instagram:

Sorry I zoned out during your story… my brain was offering me multiple side quests and overthinking opportunities.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Sorry, I missed your call. I watched it ring and everything.

Making waves on Slack:

If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is “you’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”

Going viral on Discord:

We should all start texting each other like old time explorers. ‘Dearest friend, I have survived another week. The horrors persist.’

Funny musician quotes

Funny musician quotes 🎸🎤 bring a hilarious twist to the world of melodies and rhythms! Whether you’re a rockstar in the making or just love jamming out, these witty sayings will strike a chord 😂🎶. Get ready to laugh, relate, and maybe even find the perfect line to share with your fellow music lovers 🎧🎵. Tune in for some serious fun and clever vibes!

New funny musician quotes 👇

All funny musician quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on Twitch this month:

Polar lights: when the sky forgets it’s supposed to be boring.

99 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Life is like bread. It gets hard at some point.

79 shares on Facebook this month:

Giant-sized bag of candy: I’m resealable. Me: That won’t be necessary.

10 shares on Threads this month:

Don’t you hate it when you buy veggies and when you get them home you realize they’re donuts?

33 shares on Instagram this month:

Old age is always 15 years older than I am.

67 shares on Facebook this month:

Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams, and Bruno Mars walk into a bar. They didn’t planet that way.

42 shares on Slack this month:

Trying to watch a superhero movie without stressing about the infrastructure damage to the city.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

How much longer do we have to keep pretending that Pilates isn’t a sex thing?

34 shares on Snapchat this month:

Yes, I upload photos with filters because I want to look good. If you want to see the ugly side of me, come to my house.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

Schedule your bikini wax for the first thing in the morning, and you won’t need that cup of coffee.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I get jealous when I find someone playing a song I thought only I knew.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I only attract psychopaths. If you’ve ever had a crush on me, find a therapist.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Spotify has got it all wrong, the hottest single of the year is me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t see guys traveling around on those seesaw-type push carts on railroad tracks anymore.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Checking Twitter now is like staring into your refrigerator to see if anything good has magically appeared.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomachs?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If anything goes wrong today, just dramatically whisper, “The prophecy has been fulfilled,” and walk away.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,055

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a checkout line before in their life.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Can’t wait for when we’re all in our 80’s and still tweeting.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

We need to stop telling AI that it’s paintings are bad. That’s how Hitler got started.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

My favorite part of leaving the house is looking forward to going home.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Like most people my age, I’m 50.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

If you would like to get an idea of what an exorcism is like, try putting clothes on a toddler.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

He took my last fry, your honor.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

When I moved into my new igloo, my friends threw me a surprise housewarming party. Now I’m homeless.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

Why does the weekend always feel like it lasts five minutes?

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

Going viral on YouTube:

Does running away from my problems count as cardio?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My biggest motivation for getting out of bed in the morning is knowing that I’ll eventually be able to get back in it.

Making waves on YouTube:

I did not spend years turning the faucet off while I brushed my teeth, so corporations could ruin the environment with festering AI slop.

Spotted on Telegram:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Spotted on Threads:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Going viral on Threads:

Standing on a scale and thinking: so much wisdom and inner beauty can’t be light.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Why do humans need jobs? Why can’t I just exist and make art and chill with my cat?

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