Commentary:
When you hit the base where she checks if you're lost or just brave enough to try flirting 😂🚩
259 Funny right quotes
Some woman is out there right now, pregnant with Leonardo DiCaprio’s next girlfriend.
Commentary:
Wow, I guess someone's expecting a Titanic love story in about 25 years! 🚢😂👶
To the spirits in my walls: going to the store, be right back.
Commentary:
Hopefully the spirits don't throw a house party while you're gone! 👻🎉🛒
Of course, a wife can complain to her mother-in-law. She has every right to complain to the manufacturer.
Commentary:
"Sure, let the warranty claims begin! 🤣🔧 #MotherInLawSupport"
The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.
Commentary:
"When you're single, you become a professional bed explorer—navigating from the 'Great Left Hills' to the 'Middle Valley' and ending at the 'Right Coast' every night! 😂🛏️🌍"
Being loved right feels like telepathy and a little bit of witchcraft.
Commentary:
"Finally found my Hogwarts acceptance letter: it's just being loved right! 🧙♂️💌✨"
Professor, set the time machine for right now. I’m trying to be more present.
Commentary:
"Time travel goals: destination 'now'! 🚀⏰ Because why visit the past when the present has snacks? 🍕😄"
Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.
Commentary:
"BRB, on a mission to rescue my foot from sock distress! 🧦🚨🤣"
Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.
Commentary:
"Relax, she's just in a deep battle with a 1000-piece jigsaw. 🧩 She'll text back once she finds the corner pieces! 😂📱"
All my life choices led me to this post right here, and if that’s not an indictment of free will, I don’t know what is.
Commentary:
"Is there a return policy on life choices? Asking for a friend. 🤔😂 #FreeWillFails"