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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Italians, look away now. I break my spaghetti in half before I cook it.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

My parents grew to like my girlfriend so much, they take her as their own daughter. Now they started looking for a proper boyfriend for her.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I love sleeping so much that it is the first thing I think about when I wake up.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,514

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

Shared recently on Twitch:

That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’ve reached the age where I would rather go to a hardware store than a club.

Just shared via WeChat:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Making waves on Telegram:

How do I un-know people?

Breaking via YouTube:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

Trending via X:

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

They don’t put cars in malls anymore, like they used to.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I spend half the day wondering if it’s too late for coffee and the other half wondering if it’s too early for alcohol.

Funny sales quotes

Funny sales quotes bring a splash of humor to the hustle 🎯, turning those tough pitches into moments of laughter 😂. Whether you’re closing deals or chasing leads, a witty sales line can lighten the mood and boost your motivation 🚀. Ready to add some fun to your sales game? Let’s dive into the quirkiest, most relatable sales humor that every salesperson will love! 🎉💼

New funny sales quotes 👇

All funny sales quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on X this month:

Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.

24 shares on Snapchat this month:

In university, you can literally tell who had no freedom at home.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

At the Pride and Prejudice showing booing whenever Prejudice comes on screen.

59 shares on X this month:

Drinking at home is convenient, sure, but it’s nothing like the experience of leaving the pub feeling fifty bucks lighter.

65 shares on X this month:

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

72 shares on Messenger this month:

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

34 shares on Twitch this month:

Somewhere on our planet, there is someone who doesn’t care about you at this moment. It could be billions.

28 shares on TikTok this month:

Talking to the stars because people suck.

55 shares on TikTok this month:

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

90 shares on Slack this month:

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Since emojis have been around, I finally have a rough idea of how women feel when they don’t know what to wear.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Now that I got a library card, I’m moving differently.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

His palm trees are Serengeti, destination wedding, luggage is heavy. There’s vomit on his tux already, Dollar store confetti.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

A micromanager is someone you pay to watch your top talent walk away.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Just paid my bills. The only thing left on my card is my name and expiration date.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m convinced the washing machine is a portal to another dimension for socks.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

When I was a young boy, the doctor told me I had a lazy eye. By the time I was 50, it had spread to the rest of my body.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,719

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

You never know how strong you are until someone’s story runs more than 5 minutes long.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Always be kind. You never know who has a pool.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

In a turn of unexpected events, I need to learn karate by tomorrow morning.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

The difference between a biography and an autobiography is self-explanatory.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

You ever wake up from your dreams impressed? Like, damn, that narrative structure was phenomenal.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

The final level of being smart is just pretending you don’t know anything to make your life easier.

Just landed via Threads:

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

In your twenties, there may be love. It’s very important to ignore this love and pursue a master’s instead.

Just landed via TikTok:

Name a better duo than sad and depressed.

Live now on Twitch:

Airports are so funny. Like, “Oh, you’re flying across the country? Would you like to hang out in a mall first?”

Trending via WeChat:

80s movies: Let’s go to the future! Today: Let’s go back to the 80s!

Trending via LinkedIn:

If you’re going to text your boss that you’re an hour late, make sure you end with, “I’m bringing you a ham and cheese croissant.”

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I actually think it’s quite beautiful that you have to be the one to save yourself.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I’ll call it a smartphone when I yell “Where’s my phone?” and it yells back “Down here in the couch cushions!”

Shared recently on YouTube:

It doesn’t matter how bizarre your situation is. Somebody on Reddit already been there, done that.

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