Commentary:
Oh, the heartbreak of waiting for the 'Ring of Shame' to end—my phone just loves holding me hostage! 📞😂📵
209 Funny start quotes
Yabba dabba doo used to be a rad way to start a Saturday.
Commentary:
Ah, the good ol' days when my biggest worry was bedrock traffic 🚗🦖 Yabba dabba woohoo! 🎉
The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.
Commentary:
"Feeling those rooster vibes more and more each morning! 🐔☀️ #WhyDidIGetOutOfBed"
Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?
Commentary:
"Absolutely! I bet they critique our flying skills too! 🐦👀😂"
The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.
Commentary:
"Who knew birdwatching was just a gateway to accepting my inner old person vibes! Time to grab the binoculars and start squawking! 🦜👀😅"
Instead of writing LOL, I’m going to start writing SALTS (smiled a little, then stopped). It’s more accurate.
Commentary:
"😂 Finally found my new go-to response! SALTS: The emoji of texts! 🧂📱"
Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.
Commentary:
"Nothing like a morning jog to remind me why I prefer pancakes! 🏃♂️🥞😅"
Shoutout to everyone who can’t keep up with the laundry or the dishes but decided it was a great idea to start gardening.
Commentary:
"Props to all the laundry basket and dish warriors who thought, 'Why not add dirt and plants to the mix?' 🌿🧺🍽️😂"
A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.
Commentary:
"Still waiting for the TV that understands my crispy snack struggles! 🍿🤷♂️📺🔊"
I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.
Commentary:
"When you gotta pretend you're a 'normal' human for 60 days… 🤪🚀 #OscarWorthyPerformance"