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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

It’s like 10,000 lies when all you need is the files.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Apparently, when you treat people like they treat you, they get upset.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Apologies for the late response, instead of spending three minutes answering your email, I ignored it and felt anxious for two weeks.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

I don’t need a New Year’s resolution, it’s the year’s turn to be better.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Bro, did you seriously just forget about Dre?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Answering your cell when you don’t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,588

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

Breaking via Threads:

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Studies show that people with high IQs tend to be lazy, or something like that. I didn’t read the whole article.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

The heels stay on during sex because I only painted the toe nails that were showing.

Seen just now on Discord:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Shared recently on Slack:

A man rejecting my advances can’t hurt me. I have a dog who leaves the bed every time I climb in.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I like to begin every day by looking forward to the end of the day.

Live now on Slack:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

Just shared via WeChat:

My tapeworm is starting a podcast about the McRib.

Home » Funny Together Quotes » Page 8

74 Funny together quotes

More funny together quotes 👇

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

0

5 months ago

caught, cream, diet, dieting, eat, eating, food, going, humor, husband, i, ice, ice cream, last, last night, night, relationship, second, spouse, together
The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

0

5 months ago

culture, holding, internet, movie, old, old movie, people, preservation, society, together, upload
Best friends should be able to apply to jobs together and get hired as a set.

0

5 months ago

able, application, best, best friend, friend, friends, friendship, hiring, humor, job, jobs, set, should, teamwork, together
Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

0

5 months ago

bonding, boner, carpool, club, drive, grown, grown man, home, humor, male, male bonding, man, men, strip, strip club, together

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All funny together quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on Reddit this month:

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

90 shares on Threads this month:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

29 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Billionaires didn’t get rich by working harder. They got rich by making sure you work harder, get paid less, and spend more.

79 shares on YouTube this month:

There should be a way to take back a compliment bestowed upon a person who doesn’t acknowledge it well.

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Just say ‘lol’ and move on.

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

51 shares on LinkedIn this month:

They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.

50 shares on Discord this month:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

57 shares on Threads this month:

Being in a rich person’s house is so stressful. Like, why am I struggling to find the trash?

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

If at first you don’t succeed, it’s only attempted murder.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Hey, sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I’m so introverted, I only listen to house music.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Men make it so easy to hate them.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Cool things happen when you start hanging out outside a lot. Animals just appear and stuff.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

I worry a lot about the wild animals in my neighborhood, but I’m beginning to think they don’t worry about me.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Oh, you’re extending your sale? Your Black Friday sale that ended on Tuesday? You’re extending it?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Being lazy has its advantages. I still have most of my winter fat from last year.

Seen just now on WeChat:

My nephew asks so many questions that Alexa just told him it’s okay to bathe with the toaster.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever taken an afternoon nap on the couch?

Just landed via X:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

Going viral on Twitch:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Seen just now on Slack:

A police lineup, but you have to recognize your dad’s sneeze.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Not texting back is only ok when I do it.

Just shared via Messenger:

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

Trending via TikTok:

Don’t ask me ‘how are you?’ unless you’re willing to sign an NDA.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

74 Funny together quotes

More funny together quotes 👇

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

Best friends should be able to apply to jobs together and get hired as a set.

Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

All funny together quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨