Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

“You look nervous” Thanks, I’ve been practicing my whole life.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Prime numbers are so cunty. Like okay, diva — only divisible by yourself?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

When younger I would walk up to the counter and the bartender would know me by name. Now it’s my pharmacist.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Really hate when I’m watching a movie, and I can see that they are acting.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

Isn’t it odd that “read” is pronounced like “lead”, while “read” is pronounced like “lead”?

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

I was having a great day, and then, people.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,395

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

Prepare your kids for social media by putting their artwork on the fridge and writing a bunch of mean comments under it.

Going bananas on Twitch:

My morning routine is basically just me convincing myself not to go back to bed.

Spreading quickly via X:

You ever get surprised by your own recurring issues? Like, come on man, I thought we were past this.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Sometimes you really do write a whole poem just to give one beautiful phrase a home.

Spotted on Messenger:

Kinda sucks that the prize for washing your laundry is getting to fold your laundry.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

God: “You’re all really bad at this.”

Just landed via Pinterest:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Just shared via Snapchat:

I wish I could turn everyone I love into a trinket, so I can keep them forever, because I am greedy and selfish.

Going viral on YouTube:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

Going viral on Instagram:

America is truly the best country in the world at not learning from their mistakes.

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

2 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Playful quote highlighting how people often just talk without action.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Mhm, nodding like a bobblehead while my brain goes on vacation 😂🤷‍♂️

cause, communication, conversation, heavy, humor, just, listening, mhm, people, talking

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on WeChat this month:

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens. They’re calling it the Apollo G.

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t understand why banks get so mad when you can’t pay back your loan. You already knew I had no money when I came to borrow it.

80 shares on Instagram this month:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

37 shares on X this month:

His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

I suspect that you don’t lose weight during sport because of the exercise, but because you can’t eat anything during this time.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

Not to brag, but my date returned after using the restroom.

10 shares on WeChat this month:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

33 shares on Facebook this month:

Not everyone realizes this, but if you clean the pile of receipts out of a purse and stack them together, it makes a teeny tiny book about why you’re broke.

75 shares on Slack this month:

Millennials aren’t having kids because no one’s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

If you’re going to walk in my shoes, please also wear my FitBit.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

If life was a video game, right now would be the time where I randomly press buttons because I don’t know what to do.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

A dating app to meet other people with low IQ called OK Stupid.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Sorry for zoning out, bro. It’s just, I’ve been having a bad day for several years.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Outside letting mosquitoes get some of this.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Do beavers even know what they’re doing, or do they just see water flowing down a river and think, “Absolutely not”?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Blaming the full moon for whatever unhinged decision I make tonight.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Yes, I make bad decisions when I’m drunk. But I wouldn’t say that the decisions I make when I’m sober are any better.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WeChat:

I love that cats slap the shit out of everything they can’t understand.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life or are living it to the fullest.

Spreading quickly via X:

Yes, we absolutely can push our meeting to sometime after the new year, or mid-March, or the year after next, or never.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

Live now on Messenger:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

Just shared via Threads:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Seen just now on Discord:

You hit a couple of curbs, take out a trash can and all of a sudden it’s “you can’t drive”.

Just shared via Discord:

Being annoying is the most beautiful thing a woman could be.

Seen just now on Reddit:

The tarot lady on my TikTok said that you miss me.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

When kids try to guess your age it will either be completely flattering or utterly devastating, but never correct.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

I get at least 1,000 steps in waiting for my food to be done in the microwave.

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

Everyone hates on the dentist but at least they don’t try to weigh you.

When buying presents I like to think, what would Jesus have got you? So yeah, enjoy your fish sandwich.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

I get at least 1,000 steps in waiting for my food to be done in the microwave.

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

Everyone hates on the dentist but at least they don’t try to weigh you.

When buying presents I like to think, what would Jesus have got you? So yeah, enjoy your fish sandwich.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨