Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the ancient wisdom of the Honk Shuah masters! 🧘‍♂️💭 Perhaps sleeping on that thang will bring enlightenment, or at least a comfier nap! 💤😆"

honk, humor, playful, sleep, thang

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

0

2 months ago

before, dreaming, imagination, imagine, people, sleep, sleeping, stuff, want
Stop telling everyone I’m posting from earth. People don’t need to know where I live.

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2 months ago

Earth, everyone, humor, i, know, live, living, media, need, people, posting, privacy, social, social media, stop, where
I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

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2 months ago

awkward, awkward moment, complicated, confusion, door, doors, everyday, everyday life, humor, i, irony, life, moment, pull, pull door, push, push door, relationship
Liquor store clerk: “Do you need help?” Me: “Yes, but I decided to come here instead.”

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2 months ago

clerk, decision, funny moment, help, here, humor, i, interaction, liquor, liquor store, me, moment, need, social, social interaction, store, yes
It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

0

2 months ago

activity, another, awkward, bag, eating, hands, humor, inside, know, man, popcorn, snack, touching, unfamiliar
You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

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2 months ago

anxiety, bill, card, credit, credit card, debt, finance, humor, joke, me, scare

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on TikTok this month:

Come on, karma, do your job.

47 shares on TikTok this month:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

69 shares on TikTok this month:

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

40 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

95 shares on Threads this month:

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

58 shares on Discord this month:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

23 shares on WeChat this month:

The lioness does not concern herself with the pile of clothes she moves between bed and chair every day.

18 shares on Discord this month:

I see from the back of your car that you have found Jesus, but not your turn signal.

64 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Eating trail mix should count as hiking.

47 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Oops, I accidentally healed too much. I am now uninterested in anyone but mẹ.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Girls be like “forget it, I’m fine” then set your house on fire.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Every time you rub your eyes, they should change color a little.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

My kids have been joking for weeks about a new Pokémon called Puke-Achu and then they got the stomach flu and brought it to life.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

The part right before bench pressing when you’re laying down but not lifting is so good.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Hey boy, are you the sun? Because you were a big part of my life this summer but now I feel like I never see you.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

I am losing touch with reality and I couldn’t be happier.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making, and now, I can’t read anything.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Welcome to your 50s. You used to be a lot taller.

Just shared via Reddit:

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m broke — I got money, but it’s for responsibilities.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Sneaking up behind people and marrying them.

Just shared via Slack:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!

Freshly posted on Facebook:

If we “talk,” you ain’t single. We’re in a pending relationship. You’re in the cart.

Trending via Twitch:

I don’t want your hoodie, I want your still-beating heart presented to me in a box.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Working on my harmonica skills so those around me can both hear and feel my depression.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Honk shuah. Sleep on that thang!

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

Stop telling everyone I’m posting from earth. People don’t need to know where I live.

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

Liquor store clerk: “Do you need help?” Me: “Yes, but I decided to come here instead.”

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨