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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Seven wives and no alcohol? No thanks, Mormons.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Social media can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Is ice cream for dinner a thing, because ice cream for dinner should be be a thing.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

“I made this with AI.” Yeah, we can tell.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Imagine being hungry and some guy tries to teach you to fish.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

I don’t have red flags, I have fun facts.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

I am MTV, still played music videos, years old.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

I think carefully about what I’m going to say and I still manage to say the wrong thing. It’s truly a gift I have.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,679

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

When you said “let’s circle back to that in the new year” and now it’s the new year.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Trying to explain to my cat why she can’t jump off the balcony, even though I want to as well.

Just shared via Instagram:

Cashier: Did you find everything? Me: Did you hide something?

Just shared via Snapchat:

Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Who called it a biological clock and not an egg timer?

Seen just now on YouTube:

I get it, laundry, no one is doing me either.

Trending via Twitch:

Why are those Mad Max guys always driving around, it’s not like there’s anywhere to go?

Just shared via Threads:

People who pee in the shower, have you thought about peeing before you get in the shower?

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

2 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Playful quote about being short with a witty earth-related twist.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Being closer to the ground just means I'm a pro at finding loose change! 🍀💰"

confidence, down to earth, Earth, height, humor, just, most, people, personality, short

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20 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The place where you pour in the gas is the car’s gasshole.

14 shares on Discord this month:

Sorry, can’t go out tonight. My bed told me it needs me, and I can’t let it down.

54 shares on Reddit this month:

The fun thing about Airbnb is that you get to clean someone else’s house on your vacation.

28 shares on TikTok this month:

Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

85 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’ll be honest. I can’t solve your problems. What I can do is create new, bigger problems that will make your current problems seem quaint by comparison.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

What’s your favorite song about a white boy playing funky music?

21 shares on Reddit this month:

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

84 shares on WeChat this month:

Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m a social media influencer in that I’ve influenced people to ignore me on social media.

100 shares on Reddit this month:

Prior to the arrival of Paper and Scissors, Rock faced no competition.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Watching as gravity slowly unfriends you.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Drunk me promising you anything is the equivalent of a politician giving their manifesto … it’s not gonna happen.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

This is the wrong generation for people with an old soul.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

If you think you’re going to be in a dangerous situation, dress accordingly. Don’t wear flip-flops to a bank robbery, for example.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Most of being a woman is just removing exclamation points from emails before you send them.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not having a midlife crisis, you’re just awake.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Telling my boss I can’t come back to work because I’ve discovered the joy of doing nothing.

Just shared via YouTube:

They need to invent a dishwasher with a window on it. I have to know what goes on in there.

Live now on Pinterest:

Savannah is one of the only girl’s names that’s also a significant “biome”.

Spotted on Instagram:

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

Going bananas on Twitch:

What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

Making waves on Snapchat:

My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

Seen just now on YouTube:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

People tell me to just be myself like that would be a good thing.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

Doing my bit for the evolution of the human race by eating lots of carbs and never exercising. We will adapt!

150 years ago, you could just fake your death and go overseas and live a completely different life if you didn’t like the way the cards were originally dealt.

I cheat on my taxes by sleeping with other people’s taxes.

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

Keep the laugh going 😂

Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

I avoid drama by being unpopular.

Doing my bit for the evolution of the human race by eating lots of carbs and never exercising. We will adapt!

150 years ago, you could just fake your death and go overseas and live a completely different life if you didn’t like the way the cards were originally dealt.

I cheat on my taxes by sleeping with other people’s taxes.

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨