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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Body by sandwich.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

If the only person you’re competing with is yourself, how could you lose?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

I can’t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

If I go missing and you put my weight on that poster, I swear I’m not coming back.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

You can get addicted to a certain kind of swagness.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

I should have peed before I left, and other things I’ll never learn: A memoir

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,270

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Commenting “Obviously AI” on pictures of happy couples.

Trending via YouTube:

Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

Freshly posted on X:

I get all the cardio I need by running out of patience.

Just shared via Instagram:

Every McDonald’s should have a flag they fly at half mast when the ice cream machine is down.

Going viral on Threads:

Every weekend has two days: Saturday and It’s Monday Tomorrow.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

The most important thing to remember when driving is that not everyone is smart.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Dating someone from Twitter is like choosing your spouse from a mental hospital.

Just shared via Reddit:

Paycheck hit. I’m at Michaels Arts & Crafts supply store telling them to bring out Michael.

Trending via YouTube:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Indeed, the 'i' right smack in the center of 'hurricane' seems to indicate it's all about 'me, myself, and I' causing chaos! 🌪️🤣"

humor, hurricane, i, irony, language, letter, middle, pretty, wit, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

0

2 months ago

adult, adult hack, again, away, carefully, favourite, forgetfulness, hack, humor, i, important, important thing, life, life skill, lose, never, organization, put, skill, something, thing
I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

0

2 months ago

addiction, caffeine, coffee, drink, humor, i, jittery, me, people, personality, picture
What is rizz if not swag persevering?!

0

2 months ago

charm, confidence, humor, perseverance, rizz, swag, wit
Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

0

2 months ago

childhood, everything, freezer, gaming, gaming humor, God, humor, i, kid, never, nostalgia, organization, played, problem, problem-solving, solving, Tetris, thank
Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

0

2 months ago

app, being, dating, dating app, feeling, feeling insecure, feels, guy, humor, hunt, insecure, job, job hunt, job search, online, online dating, search, self-esteem, ugly, using
My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.

0

2 months ago

bet, care, dental, dental hygienist, dentist, dentist visit, grooming, guys, hair, humor, hygienist, i, nose, nose hair, personal, personal care, thinking, visit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on Messenger this month:

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Conflicts may arise but always remember to be the bitter person.

23 shares on WeChat this month:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wouldn’t trust a single one of you with a flying car.

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sorry I’m late, my song came on at the grocery store.

32 shares on Discord this month:

You don’t need fun to have alcohol.

32 shares on Threads this month:

They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

66 shares on Twitch this month:

My favorite part about going camping is the part where I stay at home, and I don’t go camping.

22 shares on Messenger this month:

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Your honor, I have a role to play as the black sheep of the family.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

I always mean what I say, I don’t always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Do u guys also have a story in your head, and when you’re bored, you just add more to it and continue from where you left off?

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

I hate this time of year because all you guys care about is football, and no one wants to ogle my cleavage anymore.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I feel bad for those that don’t enjoy their own company. I be having a ball by myself.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

I used to think the cat was dumb for staring out the window, waiting for birds, but I’d probably stare too, if occasionally a pizza flew by.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Do you ever think about how many people squeezed the avocado that you’re eating?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

If you breakdance you buy dance.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Telegram:

Notice how Lorde has a song called “Tennis Court” and not “Pickleball Court”? Tired of y’all pushing that fake sport.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

Spotted on WeChat:

Website: We use cookies to improve our performance. Me: Same!

Broadcasted on Slack:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

My favorite part about talking to my teens is when they give me direct eye contact, listen intently, nod understandingly and then do the exact opposite of what I just said.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Love it when my brain is like, “You forgot something,” and then refuses to elaborate.

Breaking via Facebook:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Trending via Telegram:

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Making waves on Telegram:

Dear Black Friday… We all have big TVs now, put the groceries on sale.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

What is rizz if not swag persevering?!

Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨