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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m ready to try another planet.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

As a woman, you need to forgive yourself for men you entertained when you had low self-esteem.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

I just finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Someday I’ll learn how to emotion like a proper human.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

When I was a young boy, the doctor told me I had a lazy eye. By the time I was 50, it had spread to the rest of my body.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,308

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

My best three minutes of sleep are the ones right before the alarm goes off.

Making waves on Messenger:

“Turn down for what?” My ears, fella. My ears.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Lounging under the stars is top-tier therapy.

Making waves on X:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Seen just now on YouTube:

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

Going viral on YouTube:

Not being filthy rich is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Forget cheating, that’s young people’s shit. I’m ready to get married and have an affair.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I don’t need a New Year’s resolution, it’s the year’s turn to be better.

Going viral on YouTube:

I woke up alive again.

Trending via Facebook:

I have a very particular set of useless skills.

It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Indeed, the 'i' right smack in the center of 'hurricane' seems to indicate it's all about 'me, myself, and I' causing chaos! 🌪️🤣"

humor, hurricane, i, irony, language, letter, middle, pretty, wit, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Source? It was revealed to me on my walk.

0

1 month ago

casual, casual conversation, conversation, humor, me, revelation, source, walk
Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

0

2 months ago

avoidance, ducking, humor, life, me, responsibility, self-defense, someone, tomorrow
The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

0

2 months ago

accidentally, comedy, drive, fitness, gym, hit, humor, i, laziness, motivation, only, procrastination, workout
Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

0

2 months ago

affection, anniversary, card, communication, date, humor, i, love, paperless, relationship, sorry
Winter is actually awesome because if you put on a couple of movies at 5 p.m., it’s already pitch black and the evening is super long, so it feels like you’re staying up til 2 a.m., but in reality, it’s only 11 p.m. 10/10!

0

1 month ago

2, 5, actually, am, awesome, bedtime, black, couple, cozy, evening, feels, humor, movie, night, only, perception, pitch, put, reality, staying, super, time, time perception, winter
What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

0

2 months ago

90, beauty, call, humor, just, makeup, perception, reality, time, wipe

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

I love that cats slap the shit out of everything they can’t understand.

18 shares on Facebook this month:

I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

92 shares on Threads this month:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

59 shares on TikTok this month:

Would it kill the makers of avocados to put a different toy inside?

17 shares on Discord this month:

I knew school was a scam when my business teacher didn’t own a business, and my PE teacher was fat.

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Toothache and heartache comes from the same thing, which is something sweet.

89 shares on Twitch this month:

Sometime you meet such a prince that you’d rather marry the horse.

39 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Life is like a box of chocolates. More expensive than I was expecting.

77 shares on X this month:

Stick with me and you’ll go places. None of them good, but still.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

Going to ask seven friends for advice and then execute my original plan.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

I want to be a garbage man, so I only have to work one day a week.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Sorry I’m late, traffic is exactly how it’s been every day for the past couple years, and I was not expecting that.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

People see me spending money and think I’m rich. No, bro, I’m just irresponsible.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

If you think I’m funny, you should hear the voices in my head.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Ah, the magical land of Monday—the gift that keeps not giving!

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Therapy is expensive, getting lost in the woods and never being seen again is free.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Messenger:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Breaking via TikTok:

When I say I like when older men tell me what to do, I am talking about Yoda and his teachings.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

A blind guy felt my face and said, “Wonderful.”

Just shared via X:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Just shared via Messenger:

I used to eat my feelings but now it’s so expensive, I might as well go to therapy.

Trending via Pinterest:

All the clouds have come out to play today.

Going bananas on X:

Dogs can’t talk and everyone loves them. Coincidence? I think not.

Going viral on YouTube:

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Nobody bools anymore. In high school, everyone was booling.

Going viral on Reddit:

I’ve never completed a marathon, but I’ve listened to my mom tell a story, so don’t talk to me about endurance.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Source? It was revealed to me on my walk.

Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

Winter is actually awesome because if you put on a couple of movies at 5 p.m., it’s already pitch black and the evening is super long, so it feels like you’re staying up til 2 a.m., but in reality, it’s only 11 p.m. 10/10!

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨