Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Oh, pardon me for daring to momentarily steal the spotlight from your riveting monologue. I'll be sure to schedule my interruptions better next time 🙄💁‍♂️"

annoyance, communication, conversation, humor, interrupt, interruption, middle, oh, sarcasm, sentence, sorry, wit, yours

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, conflict, fight, fitted, fitted sheet, humor, irony, knife, knife fight, preparation, sheet, unexpected
I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

0

2 months ago

dead, great, humor, irony, man, never, obituary, pleasure, read, sarcasm, wish
Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

0

5 months ago

day, energetic, feeling, humor, i, maybe, morning, parallel, parallel universe, refreshed, somewhere, thinking, tiredness, universe, wake, wake up, wishful, wishful thinking
Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

0

1 month ago

ad, ads, book, books, cool, entertainment, humor, media, reading
All my passwords are protected, by my poor memory.

0

2 months ago

forgetfulness, humor, joke, memory, password, poor, protection, security
Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

0

2 months ago

big, celebration, day, dogs, doorbell, excitement, Halloween, lose, love, pets, reaction, rings, shit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on Discord this month:

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

56 shares on Slack this month:

Sometimes I glance over at my boyfriend, and he’s just looking at Google Maps, scrolling around.

84 shares on Telegram this month:

This summer went by so fast, I didn’t even get a chance to lose any weight.

20 shares on Instagram this month:

People in their 20s be like, “This is my emotional support master’s degree.”

72 shares on Messenger this month:

Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

48 shares on Facebook this month:

Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

55 shares on Messenger this month:

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

87 shares on YouTube this month:

I have three full closets of nothing to wear.

91 shares on Snapchat this month:

Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

How do I un-know people?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Getting out of a sports bra looks like it should be a professional women’s sport.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

How can you not appreciate a drunk text? Someone is absolutely off their face and still thinking of you.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Cheating on an exam by memorizing all the content beforehand so I can easily answer the questions.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

This year should be named “things I never thought could happen”.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

I’m sorry for the things I said when I was running late due to circumstances completely within my control.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

On Twitter, you will always find someone who is tweeting your thoughts but with better grammar.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Every night at bedtime I do one small ritual: six hours on my cell phone.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Roses are red. Let’s get some fresh air. Make love in the moonlight. Have a pregnancy scare.

Spotted on Messenger:

The evening news: Where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it’s not.

Spreading quickly via X:

It’s completely absurd that Silicon Valley is pushing AI on us before they figured out how to keep fries fresh for longer.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

Making waves on Telegram:

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I’m going to sleep. Anyone want anything?

Trending via Instagram:

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Going viral on Messenger:

The way Christmas shopping expects me to have money right now is, honestly, disrespectful.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I don’t have bad handwriting, I’m just using my own font.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

All my passwords are protected, by my poor memory.

Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨