Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Having a crush is so fun, it’s literally just butterflies and delusion.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Commenting “Obviously AI” on pictures of happy couples.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Getting left on read really gives me perspective on what Nigerian princes go through.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

I’m so introverted, I only listen to house music.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Y’all smell that? A beautiful day that the Lord has made.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Quitting my job to focus more on my desire not to work anymore.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,246

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

I would have loads of money if I liked Ramen Noodles and hated vodka.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’m really good at compromising as long as I get my way.

Live now on Messenger:

I was brought up in the wild by hyenas. Times were hard, food was scarce but we had some great laughs.

Freshly posted on Discord:

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“American Pope” sounds like the name of an Amazon prime original series you ignore.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Today feels like a good day for a cheeseburger.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

Making waves on Messenger:

With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

Seen just now on Threads:

Don’t rush me, I’m still deciding whether I’ll be productive or not today!

Broadcasted on Instagram:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Looks like my GPS has 'muscle memory' for the drive-thru! 🚗💥🏋️‍♂️🍔"

accidentally, comedy, drive, fitness, gym, hit, humor, i, laziness, motivation, only, procrastination, workout

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

0

2 months ago

attempt, honesty, humor, i, irony, least, say, self-deprecation, tried, try
My favorite sex position is any of them. I’m just glad to be involved.

0

2 months ago

activity, favorite, fun, glad, humor, involvement, just, position, relationship, sex
Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

0

2 months ago

after, ever, humor, irony, names, naming, notice, observation, place, place names, tower, town, water, water tower
Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

0

2 months ago

embarrassing, embarrassment, even, i, impress, myself, say, self, something
Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

0

2 months ago

entertainment, humor, listen, Netflix, relationship, subtitle, watch, women
Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

0

2 months ago

chop, chopping, cooking, crispy, delicious, food, foreplay, great, humor, i, joke, oven, peel, peeling, pieces, roast, roasting, where

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on WeChat this month:

“You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.

84 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t have a five-year plan because every two years I realize I need a different life.

77 shares on Messenger this month:

Why is everyone mean to the kindest people for absolutely no reason?

85 shares on Discord this month:

I hate when people are like “you are so nice”. I’m ugly, I have no other choice.

80 shares on X this month:

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

26 shares on Twitch this month:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

62 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

71 shares on Facebook this month:

When they know you know they did you dirty, they stay gone. And that’s the best thing.

55 shares on WeChat this month:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I didn’t want to go to work tomorrow morning.

32 shares on Threads this month:

Combining breakfast and lunch: Brunch. Combining wine and dinner: Winner.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

To all of you who have never tried blindfold archery: You don’t know what you’re missing!

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Cool things happen when you start hanging out outside a lot. Animals just appear and stuff.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

I downloaded a meditation app. Now I’m stressed about missing sessions.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

My Wi-Fi is stronger than my will to socialize.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Only a couple more days until I come home and pretend I forgot about Valentine’s Day.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

I got my superpowers when I was bitten by a radioactive idiot.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Putting a hot frying pan into a sink running with cold water makes me feel like a blacksmith.

Just landed via Discord:

I have no use for mean people. I’ll walk right past you like you’re furniture.

Just shared via Twitch:

People are teaching their dogs how to skateboard and my dog’s chart at the vet says “must be picked up, won’t walk”.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Intermittent fasting is how I drive, not how I eat.

Just landed via YouTube:

If you’re offended by bacon, the United States of America isn’t for you.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Every single bad day happened because I woke up.

Shared recently on Slack:

If I had a boyfriend, I’d watch him dig a hole at the beach and be like, “Wowww, baby, good job. That’s a beautiful hole.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Every time I blink, it’s Monday again. I can’t live like this.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Only time I believe a man is when he tells me that I’m pretty.

Spotted on Facebook:

Best time to reach me is when I’m at work. Don’t bother me when I’m at home.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

My favorite sex position is any of them. I’m just glad to be involved.

Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨