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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

I prefer people who actually know what’s going on.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

One day I will start learning from my mistakes. Today is not that day. Tomorrow isn’t looking so good either.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

“Out of sight, out of mind” doesn’t work for donuts.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

Only a fool would use the toothbrush the dentist gives you. You think the dentist would freely hand you the tools that would keep them away?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

Dads hate stopping on road trips because then all of the vehicles they worked hard to pass for the last hour get back ahead of them.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

4,044

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Normalize saying “better you than me” to people who keep complaining about everything.

Just landed via Messenger:

Before I agree to the new year, I wanna read the terms and conditions.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

The most annoying child in our house is that of my mother-in-law.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

You want me to attend a work meeting? The thing that killed Julius Caesar?

Trending via Reddit:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Making waves on Pinterest:

There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way people interact with each other on LinkedIn.

To save money in this economy, I’ve tried eating out and I’ve tried cooking at home. The answer is starvation.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
“Looks like my dinner options are takeout, homemade, or just learning to photosynthesize! 🌿😅💸”

answer, budget, cooking, eating, eating out, economy, financial, financial struggle, food, home, humor, joke, money, save, starvation, struggle, tried

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

1 month ago
annoyance, being, dude, gym, hate, humor, i, nap, sleep, treadmill, used, waking, workout
Not leaving the house and not having contact with other people. The punishments of my childhood are now my hobbies.

1 month ago
childhood, contact, having, hobby, house, humor, introvert, isolation, leaving, people, punishment, social
A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

4 months ago
fun, good, humor, little, mischievousness, personality, playful, soul
Study so hard until Dior is like Shein to you.

1 month ago
ambition, Dior, fashion, hard, hard work, humor, Shein, study, success, work
Parents be like, “I gave you everything I had,” and by everything, they meant the collector’s edition boxed set of mental illness.

1 month ago
boxed, collector’s, collector’s edition, edition, everything, family, humor, i, illness, meant, mental, mental illness, parent, parents, sarcasm, set
I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

1 month ago
dead, great, humor, irony, man, never, obituary, pleasure, read, sarcasm, wish

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Coworkers are funny. You could see a guy every day for 5 years then he quits and you never see or even think about him again.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Every girl has a dude in her inbox talking to himself.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

Girls with long hair will literally leave little traces of themselves wherever they go, like feathers falling from an angel’s wings.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Hot person: wow, everyone here is so nice.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Breaking via Reddit:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

Going bananas on X:

I have to pee. Story of my life.

Just shared via Slack:

I always sit in the middle stall so I have a bathroom buddy.

Just shared via Discord:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Computers used to scream out in pain when we connected to the internet. This was a warning and we did not heed it.

Going viral on Reddit:

My kids wanted a spooky story from the olden days so I told them the internet used to scream when you turned it on.

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Activity Log ✨

To save money in this economy, I’ve tried eating out and I’ve tried cooking at home. The answer is starvation.

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

Study so hard until Dior is like Shein to you.

Parents be like, “I gave you everything I had,” and by everything, they meant the collector’s edition boxed set of mental illness.

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Apple, who gives you permission to turn the brightness down again when I’ve just turned it up?

I quit boxing the moment I realized my opponent was allowed to punch me in the face, too.

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”

Sometimes there is no way to debug besides staring at the code until you become enlightened.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

We use our phones to watch videos that remind us of what life was like before we had phones.

Cleaning out your camera roll is like the biggest chore ever.

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

I see posts like, “If food is too expensive, just grow your own.” Okay, Einstein, why didn’t I think of that?

I’m broke — I got money, but it’s for responsibilities.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Gonna get my eye looked at today. Usually it’s the other way around.

Every night at bedtime I do one small ritual: six hours on my cell phone.

Why are there people outside at the same time as me? It’s my turn.

Women do not snore. The sound they make at night is just the rewinding of the vocal cords.

Ruin a perfectly nice trip out with your child by bringing your child.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Stop letting people who are going to hell bother you.

I like my music at a volume where I can’t hear you.

Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

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To save money in this economy, I’ve tried eating out and I’ve tried cooking at home. The answer is starvation.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

Not leaving the house and not having contact with other people. The punishments of my childhood are now my hobbies.

A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

Study so hard until Dior is like Shein to you.

Parents be like, “I gave you everything I had,” and by everything, they meant the collector’s edition boxed set of mental illness.

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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