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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

A drone, but for seeing which fast food drive-thrus have the shortest line.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Get in loser, we’re going overthinking.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I will never trust a cake transport box enough to just hold it by the handle.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

It’s so important to have people in your life who expand your snack horizons.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,757

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

That fight could’ve been an email.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re excited about your organized fridge.

Going viral on Twitch:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Live now on Snapchat:

If you ever see me running, it’s either away from my problems or towards an ice cream van.

Just landed via Facebook:

Despite all my rage, I still keep refreshing the page.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

There will only be world peace if we get another Gangnam Style.

Going viral on Instagram:

Imagine how loud a centipede would be if they wore tiny little flip flops.

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Job hunting: the ultimate game of hide and seek where you're the seeker in denial 🤦‍♂️🔍💼

dislike, employment, frustration, humor, hunting, job, job hunting, knowing, want, work, worst

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Normalize arguing with plants who refuse to stay alive.

1 month ago

alive, arguing, conversation, humor, life, nature, normalize, persistence, plants, refuse, stay
I don’t remember if I was 43 or 44 before my birthday, so now I don’t know if I’m 44 or 45. That’s your 40’s.

3 weeks ago

40s, age, before, birthday, confusion, forty, humor, i, know, memory, remember
My cat’s in a bad mood, despite eating and sleeping all day.

4 months ago

bad, behavior, cat, cats, day, eating, funny observation, mood, observation, pet, pet behavior, sleeping
Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

1 month ago

drama, family, family drama, hands, holiday, holiday stress, humor, secret, secret family, stress, time, worst, worst time, year
You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

1 month ago

allowed, driving, enjoyment, fun, good, humor, music, playing, rules, should, speed
Sometimes after sex, I wonder what it would be like to have sex as a couple.

2 months ago

contemplation, couple, humor, i, intimacy, relationship, sex, wonder

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: “Close Enough.”

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I’m so lazy that I get jealous when it’s bedtime in other countries.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Dancing alone in your home is its own kind of therapy.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

The problem is that younger me didn’t account for the fact that there’d be an older me.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

I run a parody bank account.

Spotted on Facebook:

You can say “Have a nice day,” no problem, but saying “Enjoy the next 24 hours” sounds vaguely threatening.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I hope the aliens aren’t good at basketball. My chances of making it into the NBA are already slim.

Trending via Reddit:

She was rare. Like a parking spot in the front row on a rainy day.

Going viral on Slack:

A massage is not enough, I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Just landed via YouTube:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Printers are definitely the moody teenagers of the tech world.

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Activity Log ✨

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Normalize arguing with plants who refuse to stay alive.

I don’t remember if I was 43 or 44 before my birthday, so now I don’t know if I’m 44 or 45. That’s your 40’s.

My cat’s in a bad mood, despite eating and sleeping all day.

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

Sometimes after sex, I wonder what it would be like to have sex as a couple.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

The Welsh language was invented by a dad losing at Scrabble.

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

“Turn down for what?” My ears, fella. My ears.

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

I be having full arguments in my head, then walk around mad like someone actually said something to me.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I’m afraid that AI will quickly realize that the biggest problem on Earth is humans – and then solve the problem.

I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

I just want someone who can see through all my bullshit and hate me for who I really am.

Bands who can’t afford a smoke machine should hire my wife to cook at their concert.

I love saying “my man” and not his name, so when I get a new one, nobody knows.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I should have been a Librarian, my favorite thing to do is telling people to shut up.

I’m starting to think the real hell is just being stuck in an infinite loop of self-doubt and bad life choices.

After much deliberation, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m an overthinker.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

“Why would I lie to you?” I don’t know, maybe because you’re a liar.

I am staying up till a million o’clock tonight.

I will not stop replying with gifs. I am a Millennial, it’s my birthright.

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Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Normalize arguing with plants who refuse to stay alive.

I don’t remember if I was 43 or 44 before my birthday, so now I don’t know if I’m 44 or 45. That’s your 40’s.

My cat’s in a bad mood, despite eating and sleeping all day.

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

Sometimes after sex, I wonder what it would be like to have sex as a couple.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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