Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Imagine how many meals we could provide just by taxing every tweet that incites chaos! 🤑🌍 Let's turn keyboard warriors into global warriors! 💪🍽️ #TwitterTax"

end, fundraising, humor, hunger, jar, media, satire, social, social media, swear, swear jar, Twitter, world, world hunger

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Stop asking me if I’m tired. Can’t I just be ugly?

0

2 months ago

appearance, asking, honesty, humor, i, just, me, self-deprecation, stop, tired, ugly
How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

0

3 months ago

am, anxiety, distraction, humor, i, procrastination, relax, stress, things
I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.

0

2 months ago

50, biology, body, bones, cells, energy, humor, i, morning, muscles, sleep, time, wake, wake up
Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

0

2 weeks ago

baptist, biblical, biblical figure, cartoon, cartoon character, character, figure, humor, John, John the Baptist, just, middle, middle name, name, pooh, same, winnie, Winnie the Pooh, wordplay
If you feel depressed, go for a run. You will soon find out your physical health is far worse than your mental health.

0

2 months ago

depressed, exercise, feel, health, humor, irony, mental, mental health, physical, physical health, run, self-awareness, soon, worse
No better feeling than getting home and realizing you forgot the one thing you went out for.

0

2 months ago

better, daily, daily life, errands, feeling, forgetfulness, forgot, frustration, funny moment, getting, home, humor, life, mistake, moment, realization, relatable, thing

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on YouTube this month:

My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”

76 shares on Reddit this month:

Dear diary, I have to lock in tomorrow, fix everything, and do everything.

34 shares on WeChat this month:

Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

17 shares on X this month:

Manifesting you in my bed.

64 shares on YouTube this month:

Being excited to get in bed is a different level of adulting.

55 shares on Twitch this month:

The older I get, the more I appreciate people who pretend not to notice me when they see me out in public.

51 shares on Twitch this month:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

86 shares on YouTube this month:

I woke up again, it’s pathetic how much death fears me.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

Therapy? You mean birdwatching.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

My worst fear is dating someone who loves their ex like my exes love me.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example: Jill ate her friend’s sandwich VS Jill ate her friend’s colon.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Everybody in the world, stop fighting or no dessert.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

The greatest trick ever was making people feel more connected, when they are actually more alone than ever.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Grandmas be like: Imma stay for a few days and reset your children back to factory settings.

Just shared via X:

I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

Going viral on Twitch:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

Trending via WeChat:

You know you’re getting old when you’re entering your birth year online and you need to spin that thing like you’re on wheel of fortune.

Making waves on Reddit:

I think social media is marvellous. You type your thoughts into it, and then insane people let you know if they like them or not.

Going viral on Snapchat:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

I wonder if that football guy will be at the Taylor Swift game again today.

Live now on TikTok:

I’ve never wrestled an angry alligator, but I have taken off a wet sports bra in the middle of summer. So, same thing.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

If you think about it, Santa really has the best job, he works one day a year and spends the rest of his time judging people.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Stop asking me if I’m tired. Can’t I just be ugly?

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

If you feel depressed, go for a run. You will soon find out your physical health is far worse than your mental health.

No better feeling than getting home and realizing you forgot the one thing you went out for.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨