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Who knew my inner thoughts had such an enthusiastic fan club! 🤯😂✨
Author Archives: slickboy
My life goal is to make you feel as awkward or awesome as you are making me feel.
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Awkwardness level: Jedi Master unlocked! 🧘♂️🤔✨
Centaurs can’t wipe their asses.
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Who knew the real reason centaurs run so fast was toilet paper avoidance? 🏃♂️🧻💨
He likes when I shakalaka, so, woop, there it is.
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"Just shakalaka-ing my way through life! 🎤💃✨ Woop, there it is!"
If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.
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Cooling seats: Because no one likes their shorts becoming a mini sauna! 🥵❄️🚗
Where does everyone go to get kisses? I haven’t figured this out yet.
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Maybe start hanging out near the chocolate section; I'm pretty sure that's where all the "Hershey's Kisses" are hiding! 😄🍫💋
The older I get, the more I love my morning coffee and no one speaking to me.
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Finally reached the level where caffeine's the only conversation starter I need ☕🤫🤣
Putting a hot frying pan into a sink running with cold water makes me feel like a blacksmith.
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Swinging that spatula like it's a legendary hammer in a kitchen forge! 🔨🔥😂
I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.
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When ignorance was bliss and my biggest worry was accidentally stepping on a Lego! 🤯😂🦶✨
Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.
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Well, looks like I need a loan because my cat just hired a lawyer 😂🐱💸