Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Are you gonna confess your undying love for me or what, bro?

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

College core: you sit in the class for attendance, then go home and teach yourself.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Sorry, I wasn’t really listening but that’s awesome, unless it isn’t of course.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

You know you’re getting old when you have to watch shows that are in English with subtitles.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Blaming the full moon for whatever unhinged decision I make tonight.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Warning: People who need to leave their homes today are advised that it is extremely Monday outside this morning.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and I’m like, cool, can one of you reach the top shelf for me.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

I would rather walk barefoot across a carpet made out of Legos than go to my high school reunion.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,473

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

Flip me over like a cassette tape, and play me again.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I met a microbiologist today. He was a lot bigger than I expected.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Do I need to have seen the Tokyo Olympics in order to understand the Paris ones?

Just landed via Snapchat:

You’ll never realize how crazy you really are until you fall in love.

Shared recently on X:

Going to IKEA if anyone needs some meatballs.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Going viral on WeChat:

I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

Live now on Telegram:

Normalize responding to work emails with: “What the hell are you talking about?”

Shared recently on Facebook:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

Just landed via Pinterest:

If you’re tired of “food” and want to try something a bit more sophisticated, may I recommend “cuisine”?

Being a toddler’s favorite person is what real love actually looks like.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Toddler-approved: The highest honor one can achieve before 9 p.m.! 👶❤️🏆

actually, being, favorite, favorite person, looks, love, love relationship, person, real, real love, relationship, toddler, toddler love, toddlers

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

0

2 months ago

cravings, food, fun, girls, humor, just, naan, play, play on words, pun, want, words
You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

0

2 months ago

body, chest, cleavage, double, double entendre, entendre, humor, play, play on words, store, treasure, wordplay, words
If you’re going to give me some food for thought, it had better be a pizza, or I’m out.

0

2 months ago

better, food, food pun, give, going, humor, me, pizza, pun, thought
Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

0

4 months ago

experience, humor, laptop, outdoors, outside, working
I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

0

2 months ago

Adderall, ADHD, day, drug, drug humor, every, exaggeration, extension, fantasy, hours, humor, i, productivity, thinking, time, time extension, unemployed, unemployment, wish, wishful, wishful thinking
Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.

0

2 months ago

am, break, everywhere, existential, humor, i, irony, myself, need, self-reflection, ugh

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Twitch this month:

Your 20s are for developing attachments to people who will haunt you for the rest of your life.

79 shares on Threads this month:

I’m at the gym and I just saw someone put their water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

75 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t believe the phrase “if they wanted to, they would,” because I want to, and I don’t.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

87 shares on Facebook this month:

Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

32 shares on Instagram this month:

Can’t stand British posts on my timeline. “I bought this for four squids and a halfpenny!” What the hell are you talking about?

38 shares on Discord this month:

“That’s an interesting take,” I say, not listening.

61 shares on Threads this month:

If you’re a guy and you’re struggling right now, just remember nobody cares, and it does get worse.

14 shares on WhatsApp this month:

By age 40, you should have an entire wardrobe of clothes—one size too small—that you keep in eternal optimism that you’ll fit in them again one day.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

A simple “hi” can be the beginning of two years of therapy.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

I really love how squirrels get extra chubby heading into winter mostly because it’s super relatable.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

“I’m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.”

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Me, as a therapist: “OMG, me too!”

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

How did they get kids to pose for oil paintings? Mine won’t sit still for 4 seconds for a family photo.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Screw you guys, I’m gonna go make friends with the crows.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

I’m looking for insults so intelligent you don’t realize you’ve been roasted until three thoughts later.

Shared recently on Discord:

I don’t want your hoodie, I want your still-beating heart presented to me in a box.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Can’t. Typing a password into a TV.

Shared recently on TikTok:

It’s so crazy how people are never down to just go get a burger. It didn’t used to be like this.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Please continue to leave me out of the loop.

Trending via Messenger:

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Going viral on X:

Considering joining a cult just for the subsidized housing.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I was always told to eat all my food so that I’d grow to be big and strong. When exactly does the strong part kick in?

Just landed via Facebook:

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

Trending via TikTok:

I actually think my version of the lyrics makes more sense.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Being a toddler’s favorite person is what real love actually looks like.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

If you’re going to give me some food for thought, it had better be a pizza, or I’m out.

Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨