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Looks like someone's intimate performance came with an "unsubscribe" option! 📧🙈😂
230 Funny awkward quotes
One year of friendship, and I’ve not seen your breasts? Are we really friends?
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Is it even a friendship if there's been zero wardrobe malfunctions? 😂👚🔍
Not to brag, but I can shake your hand and forget your name simultaneously.
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Simultaneous handshakes and name amnesia – my ultimate party trick! 🤝😅
Stopping a complete stranger on the street and saying, “Let’s end this little charade.”
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When you get tired of playing the world's longest game of charades with strangers 😂🤷♂️🎭
Jesus invited prostitutes to dinner and was praised for compassion. I do it, and suddenly I ‘made Christmas awkward.’
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Guess I won't be playing Santa at the next family gathering! 🎅🍽️🙈
The introvert urge to leave a social event without saying goodbye to anyone.
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Doing the Irish goodbye like a social ninja, vanishing into the shadows before anyone notices 🥷💨👋
Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.
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When you want to be the center of attention but end up just toe-tally embarrassed instead 🎯😅👟
If I meet you at a party and you instantly start asking about my job, you are subhuman to me.
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Ah, the party small-talk Olympics: diving straight into job interviews! 🥇😂👨💼🍸
The sexual tension between me and the person I’m not supposed to have any sexual tension with.
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When you’re starring in your own romcom, but nobody told the other person 🍿😅🔥
Behold the majestic elephant in its natural habitat, the room.
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When you realize the elephant's been paying rent all along! 🐘🏠😄