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15,831 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

51 Funny close quotes

Funny close quotes ๐Ÿ˜‚ are the unexpected twists that add a sprinkle of humor to everyday conversations ๐ŸŽ‰. They’re those witty punchlines that wrap up a story with a laugh, leaving everyone grinning from ear to ear ๐Ÿ˜„. Perfect for lightening the mood or adding a cheeky finish to a chat, these humorous gems are your go-to for a good chuckle or a delightful endnote! ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ“š

โ€œWe should get ticketsโ€ is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

That beeping of the parking assistant when you get too close to other cars. I’d like that for people.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

When Iโ€™m at a party, I pretend to be Pac-Man. I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

We’re so close to “Let’s circle back next year” season, I can taste it.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

Just cleaned my room in case Beyoncรฉ was somewhere close to my house and her car broke down, and she needed somewhere to sleep.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and bedtime are getting dangerously close to each other.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Whenever I close an app and immediately open it back up, I really feel how dire it all is.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

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