Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Can I come over and shed hair everywhere?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

I don’t make mistakes, I date them.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

If we’re living in a dystopian nightmare, where the hell is my housekeeping robot?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Life’s all about crossroads and intersections; unfortunately, I’m a bad driver.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I’m not a very good poker player cause my eyes turn into big dollar signs when I see that I have a good hand.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

I be like, “Awwwww cows,” and then go and eat two double cheeseburgers, lol.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

“Autism didn’t exist until recently!” Have you met old guys who work in hardware stores?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,655

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.

Just shared via Facebook:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

Going bananas on X:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

We’re so close to “Let’s circle back next year” season, I can taste it.

Just shared via TikTok:

Every time a Taco Bell rings, an angel gets diarrhea.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Not really into dating right now, but very into flirting, and that’s where things get complicated.

Shared recently on Discord:

Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

Spotted on Messenger:

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

Funny modern love quotes

Funny modern love quotes bring a fresh twist to romance 💕, mixing humor with heart 💬. Whether you’re single, taken, or somewhere in between, these clever lines add laughter 😂 and lightness to love stories. Perfect for texting your crush 📱 or spicing up date night, they remind us that love doesn’t always have to be serious—sometimes it’s just plain hilarious! Ready to smile and swoon? Let’s dive in! 😄💖

New funny modern love quotes 👇

All funny modern love quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Sorry, can’t. Waiting for my clothes to come back into style again.

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

73 shares on Discord this month:

At therapy, saying “Don’t worry about it” to every question.

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

Going to hack Kanye’s account and make him post something normal.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

How did they call Deadpool’s dog ‘Dogpool’ when ‘Deadpoodle’ was right there?

16 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

45 shares on YouTube this month:

Going to ask seven friends for advice and then execute my original plan.

21 shares on X this month:

In the coffee shop, booing everyone who orders decaf.

69 shares on Messenger this month:

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

Somewhere, a therapist you never met knows about you.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I noticed you haven’t posted in a few weeks, and just wanted to thank you.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Later is the best time to do anything.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m growing a mullet so no one will want to hangout with me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My retirement plan is time travel to the 80s.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I autograph every hotel Bible I find with “Best wishes, JC”.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If bugs could talk, they would probably say things like, “What the bug?”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,389

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

I was actually a little too thankful yesterday so today I’m going to even it out with some ungratefulness and entitlement.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

In my defense, I was left alone unsupervised.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Now I understand why old people sit outside just to sit outside.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

My theory is that women’s voices contain frequencies that men simply can’t hear.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

I autograph every hotel Bible I find with “Best wishes, JC”.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Working your entire life so you can ‘enjoy’ a couple of years when you’re close to death is the biggest scam of all time.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Travelling through the US by car is beautiful because you feel like a blood cell in a very sick man’s body.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Going to the beach as a feet guy must be insane.

Trending via TikTok:

All of my fitness goals are within reach, but unfortunately, so are the crisps.

Breaking via Discord:

I can literally trace the moment my career died back to when my boss said he was in back-to-back meetings, and I said, “Isn’t face-to-face better?”

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My kids didn’t follow me into the bathroom so now I’m scared to leave and find out what they got into instead.

Just landed via Snapchat:

We can’t use nicknames at work anymore, and I blame Teletubby.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I get sad when I see how old people my age are.

Trending via Facebook:

I’ve learned my lesson so many times that I could be a teacher.

Just shared via WeChat:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Spotted on Messenger:

I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Contrary to what we currently believe, we don’t choose afternoon naps. Afternoon naps choose us.

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