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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Sorry I missed your call 8 months ago. Is everything okay?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

It is easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle than it is to convince somebody online that they are wrong.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Headed to a wedding but my wife said I’m not allowed to refer to the bride as ‘the veiled threat.’

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Weddings should have a worst man.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

When I watch hockey, I pretend they’re fighting over the last Oreo.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

I can’t stop thinking about how a tanning bed really turns you into the human version of a gas station hot dog.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Asking for a donation like Wikipedia every time someone asks me a question.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

They say dress for the job you want, but this baby diaper isn’t very comfortable.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Some hoodies don’t hoodie the way other hoodies hoodie.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,978

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,978

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Just shared via YouTube:

The more nicknames I have for you, the more I like you.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I am a fool everyday, I don’t need a holiday for it.

Spotted on Threads:

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

Spotted on Reddit:

I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin ME.

Shared recently on Slack:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Going viral on Discord:

The economy’s so tough, people out here eating grass — matcha.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

Spotted on Snapchat:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

When someone dies people say “he’s going to meet his Maker”. No he’s not. God doesn’t mingle with the staff.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,978

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,978

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

How do I tell Instagram I don’t want to see guys almost eaten by gators?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

If you’re going to walk in my shoes, please also wear my FitBit.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

My kids had to work extra hard this morning but they were able to get the clean house back to it’s normal messy state just in time for the guests to arrive.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Welcome to adulthood: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

There’s a fat man inside me dying to get out.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Pinterest:

The only thing stopping cheesecake from being a breakfast food is you.

Live now on Pinterest:

Burger King implies the existence of an entire burger based feudal system.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

What a bleak life it must be if you’ve never had a drink shoot through your nose when you laugh.

Trending via TikTok:

Unsolicited sandwich pics.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’m not fat. I just eat in advance.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!

Trending via Reddit:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

The only exercise I’ve done this month is running… out of money!

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

My exorcist thinks we should see other demons.

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