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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Probably the most empowered I’ve ever felt was that time I stuck a fork in a socket.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

I hate when I have dreams about work. I’m not getting paid to interact with these people on my time off!

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

A baby cow is called a calf because it’s half a cow. Half cow. Calf. No further questions.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I want a hot body, but I also want hot wings.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

My four moods: I’m too old for doing that. I’m too tired for doing that. I’m too sober for doing that. I don’t have time for doing that.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

My employer is totally caring. They pay so poorly that I can’t afford to have an alcohol or drug problem.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this but you’re not dying, it’s just Monday.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I don’t wanna start the year with any negativity so if you and I have had issues in the past, apologize to me immediately.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,293

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

Flip me over like a cassette tape, and play me again.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Carrying my phone from room to room like a Victorian woman and her lantern.

Going viral on Threads:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.

Going viral on X:

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

Breaking via Snapchat:

My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.

Just landed via Telegram:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Making waves on Threads:

Don’t be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It’s the best way to find out if the person you’re interviewing is a good candidate for the job.

Just shared via X:

Years of personal growth can be unraveled in 2 days at your parents’ house.

Going viral on X:

Weekends now feel like short commercial breaks in a stressful movie.

Funny soccer quotes

Funny soccer quotes⚽️😁 bring a hilarious twist to the beautiful game! Whether you’re a player, fan, or just love a good laugh, these witty lines capture the ups, downs, and unexpected moments on and off the pitch. Get ready to smile, chuckle, and share some pure soccer joy with your crew! 😂🔥 #SoccerLaughs #GameOn

New funny soccer quotes 👇

All funny soccer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Pinterest this month:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode the bikes when we were young.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The real threat to Democracy is the Bureaucracy.

29 shares on YouTube this month:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

People complain about jury duty as if listening to true crime all day and being sequestered at night isn’t secretly every mother’s fantasy.

33 shares on Pinterest this month:

My boss denied me a raise before my shift today. What’s some music you have never wanted to hear in a coffee shop?

38 shares on X this month:

No time like now to start “flossing regularly” before tomorrow’s dental appointment.

33 shares on Snapchat this month:

Laundry day is my favorite day of the week. That’s why I dress for it every day.

13 shares on Snapchat this month:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

36 shares on Twitch this month:

Sure the Lego botanical sets are great but dusting them is another story.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Taking a Hooters waitress on a date to a different Hooters on her night off.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re wondering whether something is A.I. or not, A.I. has already won.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Meteorologists are always talking about the weather and hardly ever about meteors.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

If you tell lies about me, I’ll tell the truth about you.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey girl, are you a burger? Because I love you.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

You can learn a lot about a person by observing their every waking movement from a tree outside their house.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

When old people say, “Long as you happy,” that means you’re pretty dumb.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,715

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

I will die on this hill or any hill really. I have no hill preference.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Asking myself if that was too weird after I hit send.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

What I learned from Covid is that it’s basically possible to do all your work from home while drunk.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Introducing WifeChat™, the app where you talk to your wife.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

I’m inventing a website for unemployed people called LinkedOut.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Life would be so much simpler if you could just smack the stupid out of people instead having to reason with them.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Every time you rub your eyes, they should change color a little.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

They say 30 is the new 20, and 40 the new 30. All I know is 9 p.m. is the new midnight.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Snapchat:

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

Just shared via X:

I came, I saw, I took a selfie as proof that I came and saw.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I don’t know why “you made your bed now lie in it” is a bad thing. It sounds great! I’ll even lie in a bed I didn’t make.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

If only vehicles could be equipped with little blinky lights on the corners to alert other drivers the direction they wished to turn.

Trending via Reddit:

I’ve never found a “Remember Me” checkbox that works. Nothing remembers me.

Trending via Threads:

If you can stand me, you deserve me!

Going viral on Messenger:

Welcome to Netflix. We have everything but what you want to watch.

Shared recently on Threads:

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

Just shared via Slack:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

Going viral on Instagram:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

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