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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Every single morning, I have to get out of bed and do things, and it’s bullshit.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

To be blocked is to be seen and to be seen is to be loved.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

I’ve got to start taking better care of myself. Tomorrow I’ll walk to the liquor store.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Shouldn’t autocorrect be called autoassume?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

One minute you’re young and fun, and the next, you’re turning down the stereo in your car to see better.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

And is the financial stability in the room with us right now?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2426 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,588

Funny Quotes Topics

15,259

Funny Quotes Images

12,588

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,458

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Shoutout to drug dealers for teaching the metric system to Americans.

Broadcasted on Discord:

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

Trending via WeChat:

I disagree with my politics.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I never get as envious of parents as I do when their baby starts crying and they get to leave the event.

Going viral on X:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Spotted on Slack:

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Making waves on YouTube:

Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I love being left to my own devices. It’s like yeah, these are my devices.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I love saying “You’re welcome!” really loudly when someone hasn’t thanked me.

Spotted on Slack:

Facial recognition technology, but for me when I’m talking to people I’ve apparently met before.

Home » Funny Weigh Quotes

Funny weigh quotes

Funny weigh quotes bring a lighthearted twist to the ups and downs of stepping on the scale 😄⚖️ Whether you’re celebrating progress or laughing off those pesky pounds, these witty lines add humor to the journey 🎉💪 Get ready to smile, giggle, and maybe even snort as you embrace the lighter side of weight struggles and victories! 😂🎈

New funny weigh quotes 👇

For even more funny weigh quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny weigh quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2426 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,588

Funny Quotes Topics

15,259

Funny Quotes Images

12,588

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,463

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

You can tell it’s desperate times the way spam messages have gone from fantasies like ‘I am a prince and I want to give you money’ to ‘I am an HR manager and I have a real job for you!’

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Do people who spend a fortune on outdoor heating know they can just go inside?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

I just need to lie down for a couple of years.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Ladies, don’t date hungry guys. They’re just trying to get into your pantries.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Getting older is sexy. You moan more.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Twitch:

If humanity is so smart, how come it took thousands of years after the wheel was invented for someone to put them on a suitcase?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Reported on Discord:

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

Just shared via Discord:

My mama didn’t raise a quitter, she raised a burnt out perfectionist who is sometimes bludgeoned into settling for mediocrity.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

Trending via YouTube:

“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

Reported on WeChat:

The older I get, the more I treat birthdays like one night stands and just pretend they didn’t happen.

Spotted on Twitch:

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

Making waves on Telegram:

All these years on the internet we have been working for artificial intelligence.

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