Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Just a few more hours of scrolling, and then I will finally know.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

I need to find hobbies that don’t include my debit card.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Clearing her mind with a brisk walk along the foggy shoreline.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Maybe your baby is crying because it doesn’t like you.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Due to personal reasons, I won’t be dropping it like it’s hot anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

If I could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, I’d pick living.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Having a crush as an adult is soooo embarrassing. I’m literally too old for this. I’m gonna learn how to forge a sword.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,653

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.

Seen just now on X:

The key to happiness: 1/ order a pizza. 2/ eat that pizza. 3/ repeat!

Spotted on WeChat:

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Instagram should let you extend the run of one story for another 24 hours if the intended target didn’t see it.

Just landed via YouTube:

People would be more motivated to lose weight if the weight they lost went on to someone they didn’t like.

Just landed via Telegram:

I will never fall victim to groupthink. I have perfectly unique opinions that no one else has, and they are the dumbest nonsense you’ve ever heard.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

Shared recently on Discord:

My card declined at Subway and they started eating the sandwich in front of me.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Made it to Friday, but at what cost? Monday is literally in 20 minutes.

If you want people to have kind words when you pass, you should say kind words when you’re alive.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like my new plan is to compliment everyone… starting with my mirror! 😄🪞✨

alive, communication, death, humor, kind, kind word, kindness, legacy, life, pass, people, say, should, want, word, words

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

0

2 months ago

dating, drunk, ever, ex, humor, i, past, reflection, relationship, wonder
Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

0

2 months ago

another, conclusion, discussion, end, everything, humor, irony, meeting, meetings, needs, office, procrastination, work
Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

0

2 months ago

challenge, communication, figure, fun, me, mystery, opening, relationship, trying
I handed in my exam blank so that the teacher has more time to celebrate Christmas with her family.

0

2 months ago

blank, celebrate, celebration, Christmas, exam, family, handed, humor, i, procrastination, teacher, time
After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.

0

4 months ago

actually, after, chore, cross, daily, daily life, dish, dishes, experience, household, household task, humor, i, life, list, lot, never, task, to-do, to-do list, washing, washing dish
My favorite part of fall is when the mosquitoes go back to hell.

0

4 months ago

autumn, back, fall, favorite, hell, humor, insect, joke, mosquito, pest, season

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

Seeing a beautiful woman drink her beer is like witnessing an angel take flight.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

Oh, to live in an apartment alone and do whatever I want.

88 shares on Twitch this month:

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

You either die a people pleaser, or live long enough to start leaving texts on read.

32 shares on X this month:

Me watching any modern ad: How is this ad an ad for the thing it’s an ad for?

81 shares on X this month:

Normalize talking to people in the gym who have earbuds in, they love that.

28 shares on TikTok this month:

I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.

78 shares on Instagram this month:

Absolutely destroyed my bed last night… I cuddled those covers so hard.

25 shares on Discord this month:

Time Magazine should have a Worst Person of the Year!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

There’s endless songs out there about love and pain and life, but basically only one about the wheels on the bus. Just goes to show you they nailed it the first try.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Woke up and immediately broke my resolution to be less sexy this year.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

I grew up ugly, so I had to be funny, and then got hot in my twenties, so that’s how I became perfect.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

My bad if I ever left you on read. I didn’t mean to open the message.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Pressure washing is like regular washing but with a lot of yelling and tight deadlines.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

People will make you sad but cheese will always make you happy. The choice is simple.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Vegetables are actually pretty good when they’re fried.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

People who grew up with money will look you in the eyes and ask you something insane like, “Do you ski?”

Going bananas on Messenger:

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

Making waves on Reddit:

For my future, I wish for another planet and a ticket to get there.

Breaking via Instagram:

Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

Shared recently on Reddit:

“I’m at the age where, if I use the wrong pillow at night, it hurts to turn my head the next day.”

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

First date idea: unlock and switch phones with the other person for exactly two minutes and if no one is horrified then the date continues.

Going viral on YouTube:

Not all works of art are in a museum. I, for example, am lying on the couch at home.

Trending via Instagram:

I thrive in a waiting room. You need me to sit in a chair and look at my phone? No worries, love, I do this at home.

Spotted on Threads:

Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

Just landed via Threads:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you want people to have kind words when you pass, you should say kind words when you’re alive.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

I handed in my exam blank so that the teacher has more time to celebrate Christmas with her family.

After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.

My favorite part of fall is when the mosquitoes go back to hell.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨