I’m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

Having a conversation with me is kind of like taking the scenic route.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Every time I have to leave the house and be around people I remember why I hate having to leave the house and be around people.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t even know what I’d do if a sailor called me a landlubber. I’d probably lose my cool.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Since emojis have been around, I finally have a rough idea of how women feel when they don’t know what to wear.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping tube is still a fun thing to bonk someone over the head with.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

I toss and turn in bed all night like a beautiful rotisserie chicken.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I put the mess in domestic.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

I bought a little notebook to keep track of who’s above the law.