Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

I prefer people who actually know what’s going on.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

A weighted blanket isn’t enough today, I need to be compressed into a zip-file.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

They should invent someone who holds me.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Some people come into your life to remind you why you don’t wanna let anyone into your life.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Mixed signals mean they don’t like you like that. It’s that simple.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

People aren’t so bad if you stay indoors and don’t talk to them.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,705

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Growing up, there was a Cody in every elementary school class, but as an adult, I haven’t met a Cody in years. Where did they go?

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

“God has a plan for you!” Okay, well, I have some notes for him.

Trending via Twitch:

We don’t make people walk the plank like we used to.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Don’t underestimate your white tee and denim jeans.

Shared recently on Threads:

Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.

Breaking via Instagram:

Halloween is cool, but nothing is spookier than my previous choices in men.

Going viral on Discord:

I’m always looking for new and exciting ways to give up.

Making waves on Discord:

This world is extremely kind to men, so I am not.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

Making waves on Telegram:

Her idea of a romantic setting is one that has a diamond in it.

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

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Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.
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Commentary:
"Life's too short to dwell on the small stuff – just sprinkle some LOLs and keep strutting like the fabulous unicorn you are! 🦄😂 #LaughItOff #StayFabulous"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Discord this month:

Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.

80 shares on Twitch this month:

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and can’t remember the password to any of them.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sometimes I’m like….. what is the point of all this? And then I hang out with the people I love, and for a brief moment, I see.

36 shares on Facebook this month:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

67 shares on Snapchat this month:

Some people graduate with honors, I am just honored to graduate.

66 shares on Reddit this month:

I’ve named my couch American Idle.

49 shares on YouTube this month:

When I die I want people to say “Hmm, I didn’t know you could die like that.”

29 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The best part about having a crush is when they crush all your hopes and dreams.

83 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Life is what happens in between trips to the fridge.

87 shares on Threads this month:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk calmly to the lock. We all know that communication is the key.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If someone asks you: ‘Why are you single, don’t you like people?’, answer: ‘Why aren’t you a millionaire, don’t you like money?’

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The sandwich I made for lunch didn’t even make it until 10am.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know what i’m going to be for Halloween, so I’m probably just going to put in a tampon and go as a sexy kite.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s my birthday, but I’m not gonna post about it for attention like some kind of loser.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Horse girls and cat ladies get all the attention, but what about crow women?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

WhatsApp shouldn’t just display “seen”, but also “lies” and “also writes with other girls”!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,549

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

My lotion bottle says to use it on areas of irritation, so I slathered it all over my coworker, Deborah.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, I shut it off and back on again, why are you still here?

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

I need a room full of mirrors, so I can be surrounded by losers.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Caffeine isn’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat a gun.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m a comedian. My pronouns are ha/ha.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

As a student, the most comforting words you’ll ever hear are “I haven’t started either.”

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I’ve noticed that when young people now talk about “old people”, they mean me.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Relationship status: he escaped.

Trending via Snapchat:

I think every app should, by law, let you deactivate all of its short-form video content.

Going bananas on Discord:

The most dangerous drinking game I play, is seeing how long I can go without coffee.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a thousand bats to get out of social situations.

Going viral on Facebook:

My husband threw away a perfectly good box as if we might not need it in 20 years.

Seen just now on X:

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

Shared recently on Threads:

Some people change their faces like traffic lights change their lights.

Trending via Discord:

Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

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